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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him everyday now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7015) - you deserved it (22701)
On 06/26/2012 at 2:18am - work - by cmck932012 - United States (Georgia)
Today, I foolishly told my husband that I know he's been holding back sexually, and that I was willing to indulge any sexual fantasies he may have. Now it seems that tonight, I'll be responding to the name "Fluttershy". FML
I agree, your life sucks (18839) - you deserved it (10826)
On 06/25/2012 at 6:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Today, my boss grabbed my arm, raised it above my head, closed my other hand into a fist, and pushed it into his armpit. After staring at me for several seconds, he winked and left without saying a word. This isn't the weirdest thing he's done, and I'm actually starting to fear for my safety. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20746) - you deserved it (1428)
On 06/25/2012 at 5:49pm - work - by thinkimquitting (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I finally achieved the perfect hourglass figure. Too bad I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15844) - you deserved it (3541)
On 06/25/2012 at 10:05am - misc - by Wwiimaniac (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I received an acceptance letter to Juilliard. After showing it to my mom, she tells me I can't attend because Robin Williams graduated from Juilliard, and he now has too much facial hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21270) - you deserved it (1241)
On 06/24/2012 at 9:57am - misc - by A.W (woman) - United States
Today, my husband put some photos of our wedding on Facebook. He named the album "FML". FML
I agree, your life sucks (23998) - you deserved it (2274)
On 06/23/2012 at 1:17am - misc - by blah56 - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I was having a funny conversation with a guy I had met on Xbox. I told him the state I lived in, and he said, "Don't tell me that, I might stalk you." He wasn't kidding. He has somehow found out my phone number, and my address. He says he's going to send me flowers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10441) - you deserved it (22955)
On 06/22/2012 at 9:08am - misc - by ExplosiveDildo (woman) - Afghanistan
Today, I made a phone call in my office to my doctor. He wanted to call a prescription to my pharmacy, but wanted to know by what method I would prefer my medication. During our conversation, a group of potential clients walked in just as I exclaimed "I definitely prefer oral." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18547) - you deserved it (2749)
On 06/22/2012 at 3:28am - work - by me - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was having a debate with my friend over tattoos. I used the example that you wouldn't put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari. He looked me in the eye and said, "Yeah, but you're no Ferrari. More like a Prius." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8334) - you deserved it (18930)
On 06/17/2012 at 1:01pm - misc - by kitty shah - United States
Today, I was out to coffee with an extremely attractive friend. A crazy man came up to the window we were facing. He took one look at her, then turned to me with a big, congratulatory smile, flashing me a thumbs-up. Then he turned to her, frowned disappointedly and gave a thumbs-down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16702) - you deserved it (1323)
On 06/14/2012 at 4:11am - misc - by offended (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I found out that if you whistle Christmas carols while shitting in a public bathroom, a little boy might just look under the stall to see if Santa is pooping. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9771) - you deserved it (15631)
On 06/13/2012 at 9:17pm - misc - by ww2freak - United States (Virginia)
Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34104) - you deserved it (2875)
On 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm - misc - by creeped out - United States (New York)
Today, I woke up from a sexy dream about my boyfriend. Too bad I'd fallen asleep in my living room with my whole family over, grandma included. They were all staring. I'd been sleep humping and moaning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25685) - you deserved it (3908)
On 06/07/2012 at 1:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be a great time to stick his finger up my nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16363) - you deserved it (3097)
On 06/07/2012 at 12:02am - intimacy - by C0r1nn3 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I got a lecture about being lazy and not being active enough for my age, which ended with, "When I was your age, I was out every night having sex with anything that breathed." Thanks Gran. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18865) - you deserved it (2256)
On 06/06/2012 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by BrianTheLion89 - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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