fbhorn

Search for a member

fbhorn

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3863
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

fbhorn's page activity

Visits<b>thatkidhesh</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 4:42pm<b>Catkam623</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 2:08pm<b>Vanessa_Leeann26</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 6:42pm<b>ImAFaker</b> - the 03/15/2013 at 1:32am<b>Ergayles</b> - the 02/27/2013 at 11:55pm<b>FMLJFL</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 9:08am<b>karlcolt45</b> - the 02/13/2013 at 4:47am<b>qwillis98</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 9:40pm<b>hayhay2301</b> - the 02/01/2013 at 10:16pm<b>rkmn8r</b> - the 02/01/2013 at 6:13pm<b>Love_sosa</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 9:31pm<b>aileen15</b> - the 01/02/2013 at 11:15pm<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 11:10pm

fbhorn's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of fbhorn's badges

fbhorn's favorite FMLs

Today, I met someone really cool and their departing words were, for some odd reason, "We should totally be friends, I mean unless you're schizophrenic or something, haha!" I have schizophrenia. FML

by Anonymous / 10/30/2012 at 7:42pm / United States (Ohio) / Health

Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get me toilet paper. My grandpa slips a small leaf under the door and says, "This is what I used in my day." FML

by Obi1Shinobi / 10/30/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, despite my pain, my mom still refuses to take me to a foot doctor because, "They all have foot fetishes." FML

by illjustlimpthen / 10/24/2012 at 10:44pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Health

Today, despite my pain, my mom still refuses to take me to a foot doctor because, "They all have foot fetishes." FML

by illjustlimpthen / 10/24/2012 at 10:44pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Health

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate, and I gave her a condom to put on me. She tried to open it with her teeth, but ripped it. That was my only condom. I'm now sitting here watching a soap opera with a boner. FML

by Andrew / 10/23/2012 at 3:12pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my dad was teaching me how to drive. He told me that stop signs with white outlines are "optional." I ran through the next one I saw and got pulled over by a cop. My dad is making me pay the ticket for being "that stupid." Thanks dad. FML

by Dinger1992 / 10/23/2012 at 9:19am / United States / Money

Today, I woke up and found a little note where my husband should have been. It said, "We've had some good times, hun, but it's time for me to move on." We've been married for 15 years, and have 3 children. FML

by AbandonedHouseWife / 10/17/2012 at 4:16pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, at the age of 57, my dad got a unicorn tattooed on his shoulder. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2012 at 1:18am / France (Bretagne) / Love

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

by L / 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm / Norway (Sor-Trondelag) / Intimacy

Today, I tried role playing with my boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie, I announced, "I'm Natalia, a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian and your cock." He laughed so hard he practically pissed himself. The night ended in me doing his laundry. Alone. FML

by Anonymous / 10/16/2012 at 8:36am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, while at a pool party, I found out the reason I got my new, white bikini at such a bargain price; it goes completely transparent when wet. I only realized this after everyone was staring at me and whistling. FML

by bargainshopper / 10/16/2012 at 7:28am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was grocery shopping, when an elderly lady walked up to me and tripped over her own feet. I caught her by the arm, at which point she shrieked at me for "groping" her. She ended up smirking as security threw me out of the store. FML

by atleastshelldiefirst / 10/12/2012 at 8:18pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my husband to come upstairs to our bedroom, thinking I could get some "special time." It ended up with us arguing about his mother, and him falling asleep cuddling my pillow while sucking his thumb. FML

by anonymous2.0 / 10/12/2012 at 2:15am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

by wdunn69733 / 10/11/2012 at 10:30am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

by wdunn69733 / 10/11/2012 at 10:30am / United States (Georgia) / Kids