Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

fbethslife

Offline (13 hours ago) | Search for a member

fbethslife

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 11 December 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1033
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About fbethslife : Of all the FMLs I've submitted, the only one that was posted was one I sent in from my boyfriend. When I wasn't logged in. FML

fbethslife's page activity

Visits<b>jjjoey4</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 3:11pm<b>MsJewelable</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 12:32am<b>Baucis</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 8:22pm<b>BrianneL2312</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 3:07pm<b>Give_Linux_A_Go</b> - the 02/24/2012 at 4:44pm<b>Epikouros</b> - the 02/24/2012 at 4:39pm<b>lordllama</b> - the 10/25/2011 at 9:10pm<b>FlyingWhisps</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 4:41pm<b>Doortje</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 3:18pm

fbethslife's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of fbethslife's badges

fbethslife's favorite FMLs

Today, while trying to kill a spider in my kitchen, I thought it would be wise to throw a bottle at it. The bottle hit the wall, bounced off the fridge and hit me in the face. The lucky spider crawled away, and is surely still laughing somewhere. FML

#19575645
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8127) - you deserved it (26653)

On 05/05/2012 at 1:01am - animals - by lexii - United States

Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML

#19539358
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44604) - you deserved it (3424)

On 04/27/2012 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by yosenfal (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)

Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML

#19539358
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44604) - you deserved it (3424)

On 04/27/2012 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by yosenfal (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)

Today, I told my girlfriend that I would still care for her if she was a vegetable. She informed me that if I was a potato, she would cut me into chips. And fry me. FML

#19459433
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20430) - you deserved it (6406)

On 04/13/2012 at 12:46am - love - by jesifairy - Australia

Today, while I was eating lunch at work, I practically had a panic attack because I'd forgotten to feed my Neopet. FML

#19168741
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8992) - you deserved it (32314)

On 02/26/2012 at 4:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally broke down and told my mom that I'd relapsed with my eating disorder. She told me to quit whining and eat a burger because she didn't want to pay for another therapy session. FML

#19142645
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25189) - you deserved it (10116)

On 02/22/2012 at 10:49pm - health - by SmallTownCutie -

Today, my husband and I were about to have sex. As soon as I got on top, he started speaking in a robot voice, then demanded that I call him "the Fuckinator." FML

#19136346
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34220) - you deserved it (5000)

On 02/22/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend said I could only take her virginity while I have a flaccid penis, so I won't hurt her. I get hard from just staring at her covered ass. FML

#19131405
411 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39650) - you deserved it (5791)

On 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I accidentally dropped a sculpture at college, and it broke. Some weirdo wearing a pink cape and a fake moustache bitched me out and told me not to be such an attention-seeking drama queen. FML

#19026244
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23751) - you deserved it (2982)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was attacked by a bird at 3 in the morning. The bird was being attacked by an owl, and decided the safest place to land wasn't in a tree, but my face. No-one will believe me, despite the 12 stitches across my face. FML

#19026198
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22920) - you deserved it (1834)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I caught my boyfriend trying on my bra. He still has no excuse. FML

#19023542
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25157) - you deserved it (3722)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, while I was going to the bathroom, my engagement ring fell off into the toilet, which then automatically flushed. FML

#19017910
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34047) - you deserved it (4495)

On 02/07/2012 at 12:49pm - misc - by joy - United States

Today, I made a Sim of myself and had her work out until she was completely fit, then got her a job and a husband. Meanwhile, I sat at my desk, fat, single and jobless. FML

#19013496
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14307) - you deserved it (37178)

On 02/06/2012 at 9:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was left at the altar. For the second time. By the same man. FML

#18949271
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31539) - you deserved it (56677)

On 01/30/2012 at 12:37am - love - by givingup (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

#18946444
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21639) - you deserved it (9662)

On 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm - health - by Rachal - United States (Pennsylvania)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Idan Schneider's illustrated FML
  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: