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fatnesspig

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  • Number of visits : 1588
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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fatnesspig's page activity

Visits<b>hotrodman</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 10:34pm<b>bella519</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 5:39pm<b>euphoriagorillaz</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 12:15pm<b>cookeh</b> - the 11/11/2013 at 12:05pm<b>cryssycakesx3</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 2:21am<b>Catkam623</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 7:44pm<b>sarao01</b> - the 07/10/2013 at 7:28pm<b>Kilgore90</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 2:32pm<b>dbaliki918</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 11:01pm<b>BaconCrisp</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 5:09pm<b>ewang_</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 9:34am<b>slkgtr</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 3:09am<b>jehdj</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 2:44am<b>ColaNation</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 11:38pm<b>Broc831</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 11:14pm<b>bitset</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 10:38pm<b>tartar18</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 10:17pm<b>lindy147</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 9:55pm

fatnesspig's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

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fatnesspig's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that when your mom threatens to embarrass you by singing in public, the wrong response is, "Yeah? I dare you." FML

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27179) - you deserved it (39010)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, it's my birthday. I don't mind crappy gifts, but I have to wonder why the hell my boyfriend bought me a home enema kit. FML

#20890231
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38319) - you deserved it (3702)

On 09/21/2013 at 2:10pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I walked in on my daughter shaving the testicles of her boyfriend, who had apparently snuck in through her window. FML

#20888905
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53012) - you deserved it (5369)

On 09/20/2013 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by disappointed (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my friends took my work laptop and changed the sounds. Now, whenever I remove a USB device, a woman's voice screams "Put it back!" and when I insert a USB device, it says "Oh, you need to push it in harder!" I don't know how to change it back. FML

#20793994
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54730) - you deserved it (6340)

On 07/20/2013 at 11:45am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was going to fight the guy who my girlfriend left me for. While waiting at the park, he sent me a video of the two of them having sex on my bed. FML

#20768398
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65654) - you deserved it (21340)

On 07/07/2013 at 8:35am - love - by SimG (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that when my husband agreed to donate sperm so an infertile friend and his wife could have children, there was nothing "artificial" about the insemination. FML

#20762781
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63950) - you deserved it (5539)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:41am - intimacy - by OnPlanetVenus (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I returned home from an extended vacation only to find out my cousin wasn't kidding when he said he was going to steal my boyfriend. I thought I was dating a straight guy. FML

#20761976
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42834) - you deserved it (3163)

On 07/03/2013 at 4:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while walking around town, some guy grabbed me from behind, clutched at my nipples, and said, "That's where I always imagined they were." FML

#20746398
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51603) - you deserved it (3894)

On 06/25/2013 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while having sex with my husband, he accidentally elbowed me in the face. I don't know which is worse: that he didn't stop to see if I was OK, or that it seemed to turn him on and he climaxed immediately after he'd hit me. FML

#20736775
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54060) - you deserved it (5361)

On 06/20/2013 at 4:47am - intimacy - by naughtymommy0317 (woman) - United States

Today, I caught my 16-year-old daughter and her boyfriend trying to use a latex glove as a condom. FML

#20735858
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53766) - you deserved it (8459)

On 06/19/2013 at 7:40pm - intimacy - by whatno - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out I'm going to be a grandfather. I'm 29, my son is 13 and the girl in question is 16. FML

#20731946
437 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59156) - you deserved it (36981)

On 06/17/2013 at 6:49pm - kids - by young grandpa - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to a bar for some drinks. A guy looked me up and down, gave me a suggestive smile, then asked for my name and number. I'd have been a little less creeped out if he hadn't been standing beside me at the urinal the whole time. FML

#20728225
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47136) - you deserved it (3765) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/15/2013 at 6:24pm - love - by Sovekipisse (man) - France (Pays de la Loire)

Today, at a family reunion, my visibly drunk grandparents heard about my new boyfriend, who is a cop. My gran asked if he ever made me feel like Rodney King in the bedroom. Then my grandpa, fresh off a DUI, asked if my boyfriend's dick is as bent as the police force. FML

#20727456
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40000) - you deserved it (3704)

On 06/15/2013 at 1:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was lost in a foreign city so I asked a girl for directions. She replied, "Directions? ONE DIRECTION!" and started screaming in my face and jumping around. FML

#20572868
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43064) - you deserved it (5204)

On 04/03/2013 at 5:17am - kids - by Anonymous - United States



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