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Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, I was walking with and hugging my girlfriend at the same time. I tried to be funny and touched her breast, saying "Boob" in a silly voice. In reply, she slapped me in the crotch, saying "Dick" in the same voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6819) - you deserved it (45233)
On 11/21/2010 at 3:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico (Morelos)
Today, I got an electric razor and a lesson from my dad on how to shave my mustache and chin. I also got my period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31429) - you deserved it (2962)
On 11/20/2010 at 12:21am - misc - by Tasha84 - United States (Texas)
Today, I just found out that my ex girlfriend is gonna be my step mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (63608) - you deserved it (3123)
On 11/15/2010 at 6:33am - misc - by xkal174 - United States (New York)
Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After about minutes of freaking out and explaining on how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was best thus far. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40479) - you deserved it (13600)
On 11/10/2010 at 5:28am - health - by youreajoker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I had a job interview. When I got there, the lady interviewing me shook my hand and said, 'Hello, I'm gay.' I found this strange and I didn't know what to say, so I stated, 'Aw, it's OK, I support you.' She looked pretty offended, and I realized why when I found out that her name was Gaye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29130) - you deserved it (12822)
On 11/04/2010 at 5:18am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I jokingly asked my husband if he had ever cheated on me. In the most sincere and honest tone, he said "if I ever have or ever will, there's no way you would ever find out. I love you too much to lose you", and gave me a hug. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27595) - you deserved it (6037)
On 11/03/2010 at 2:40am - intimacy - by spockswifey - United States
Today, it was my dad's birthday. As a joke, I got him one of those big erasers that say, "FOR BIG MISTAKES." He opened it, tried to erase me with it, then said, "It doesn't work." and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15314) - you deserved it (18536)
On 10/17/2010 at 2:28am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by spray-painting it on my locker. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25656) - you deserved it (2410)
On 09/22/2010 at 3:47am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Venezuela (Distrito Federal)
Today, my bag, including phone, money, keys and cards, was stolen. In a church. During my wedding. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36158) - you deserved it (2290)
On 09/18/2010 at 8:36pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Austria (Tirol)
Today, I asked my boyfriend what he would do if I were to get pregnant. Expecting him to give me a cute and supportive answer, he replied, "We'd be finding you a nice flight of stairs to accidentally fall down." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31749) - you deserved it (10673)
On 09/13/2010 at 5:14am - love - by vikinggirl (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, someone whistled, so I turned around. The guy behind me then said: "Did you seriously think that it was meant for you?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28509) - you deserved it (3352)
On 09/12/2010 at 10:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Today, a little girl asked me how I could be so fat and still have small boobs. Great question. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27797) - you deserved it (6781)
On 09/08/2010 at 7:13pm - health - by Lauren - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my doctor told me I had "abnormally large breasts." This wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't a 20 year old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22359) - you deserved it (5209)
On 09/05/2010 at 8:29pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I Googled my father, who I haven't seen in 3 years. The first website link was his obituary. When I confronted my mom about it, she said, "Oh, didn't I tell you?" and walked off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36228) - you deserved it (1761)
On 08/31/2010 at 3:54am - misc - by missyoudad. (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend has been asked by multiple people "why he is going out with such an ugly girl." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25094) - you deserved it (2728)
On 08/30/2010 at 1:35am - love - by hjufidskndf - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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