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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I took Ambien for the first time. Not only did I not fall asleep, but I took my mother through a list of all the men I've slept with. I do not remember a thing, but apparently I was very thorough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16663) - you deserved it (4096)
On 02/11/2010 at 1:42pm - misc - by tammyg - United States
Today, I was carrying a hot cup of noodles. I sneezed and accidentally stabbed myself in the forehead with a fork. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18321) - you deserved it (4297)
On 02/11/2010 at 1:35pm - misc - by Nick (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23370) - you deserved it (5821)
On 02/10/2010 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my dad and I had an argument. Then we went outside to shovel the snow out of the driveway. I heard him yelling and figured he was just yelling at me some more, so I turned my iPod up so I couldn't hear him anymore. Turns out he had fallen, cracked a rib, and needed help up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7642) - you deserved it (32905)
On 02/08/2010 at 10:19am - misc - by skinsfan7592 (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my dad and I had an argument. Then we went outside to shovel the snow out of the driveway. I heard him yelling and figured he was just yelling at me some more, so I turned my iPod up so I couldn't hear him anymore. Turns out he had fallen, cracked a rib, and needed help up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7642) - you deserved it (32905)
On 02/08/2010 at 10:19am - misc - by skinsfan7592 (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my dad and I had an argument. Then we went outside to shovel the snow out of the driveway. I heard him yelling and figured he was just yelling at me some more, so I turned my iPod up so I couldn't hear him anymore. Turns out he had fallen, cracked a rib, and needed help up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7642) - you deserved it (32905)
On 02/08/2010 at 10:19am - misc - by skinsfan7592 (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my son learned about various animals in school, and how they urinate to mark their territory. Apparently, the entire second floor of my house is now my son's territory. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23165) - you deserved it (1703)
On 02/07/2010 at 7:35pm - kids - by grrrr - United States
Today, I found out my mom pretended to be me and had AIM conversations with my boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25607) - you deserved it (1862)
On 02/07/2010 at 12:15am - love - by nekoneko (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my mom and I went to the mall to look for some boxer briefs. While looking, I saw two girls I knew from school, so I went over to say hello. At least, that was my plan, but my mom screamed, "Look! These have dinosaurs on them!" They left the store giggling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20210) - you deserved it (4365)
On 02/06/2010 at 3:01pm - misc - by dinosaurboy (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, there was a new and extremely attractive girl at youth group, so I decided to introduce myself. Her reply was, "Wow, I've always wanted to meet a gay guy!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25023) - you deserved it (3029)
On 02/06/2010 at 1:39pm - love - by Richard - Sent from mobile version
Today, I had to explain to my son that his dad was too busy in a raid on World of Warcraft to be at his award ceremony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40648) - you deserved it (30605)
On 02/02/2010 at 3:30pm - kids - by fuckmylife (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he'd like to dress me in a squirrel suit and chase me through the forest. This was the surprising result of a discussion on how to spice up our love life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20101) - you deserved it (3293)
On 01/31/2010 at 7:24pm - love - by JK (man) - United States (California)
Today, against the will of the kids in my class, we played kick ball. The first time I rolled the ball, the tallest, biggest kid kicked it as hard as he could. I caught it though, with my nuts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16564) - you deserved it (3514)
On 01/29/2010 at 3:19pm - work - by ouch (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I went to a camp my friend invited me to, thinking we'd just be roasting marshmallows all day and hanging out outside. Nope. It was a soul searching, get closer to Jesus camp. The first five hours were spent repeatedly praying and singing. I'm not a Christian. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27467) - you deserved it (8428)
On 01/29/2010 at 6:22am - misc - by purple - Sent from mobile version
Today, the girl I've been dating asked me to describe her body. I said "Thin an toned but curvy in all the right places." I then asked her the same question to which she replied, "I don't know, you know I'm always drunk when we're together." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20394) - you deserved it (3134)
On 01/29/2010 at 3:43am - love - by pugs - Sent from mobile version
Monday 17 June 2013
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