faceless99

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faceless99

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1332
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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faceless99's page activity

Visits<b>TheCurvyGamer</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 9:37am<b>Vitrolicz</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 5:19pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 1:28am<b>TheZarola</b> - the 10/01/2010 at 10:11pm<b>malakaboy</b> - the 06/08/2009 at 6:13pm

Fucked!<b>TheCurvyGamer</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 2:37pm

faceless99's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

faceless99's favorite FMLs

Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I am so hot, I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply "I didn't know you were into Pokémon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokémon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML

by MitchFail / 07/23/2009 at 2:42am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

by harrysolo / 07/18/2009 at 9:26pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, as a camp counselor, I was discussing how stupid the idea of santa is to a co-worker, and how every parent should tell the truth to their kids. The intercom microphone was on. I single handily told a group of 100 six year olds that santa was not real. FML

by Anonymous / 07/16/2009 at 8:14pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend's mom pulled me aside and started telling me about how her daughter was extremely depressed and suicidal before she met me, and how happy her family is because of me. I was planning on breaking up with her within the next week. FML

by hungryman / 07/14/2009 at 5:10pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came out to my dad. He called me weak minded and said that he has never been more disappointed in me. I didn't come out as gay. I came out as a vegetarian. FML

by pkstarstorm / 07/14/2009 at 2:58am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a shower and I saw a new body wash that said "radiance ribbons." That sounded a little effeminate, but it smelled manly enough and the only alternative was normal soap, so I used it. Just now, I stepped out into the sun and found out what "radiance ribbons" means. I sparkle. FML

by takinabreak / 07/10/2009 at 1:03pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my birthday, and my boyfriend got surgery on his gallbladder because he had big gallstones. After they were removed, he was still a little out of it from the morphine. He gave the gallstones to me for my birthday. Better still, his mom suggested I make a necklace out of them. FML

by gallstones / 07/09/2009 at 3:02am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, my suburban, white boyfriend of two years told me he wanted to tell me something serious. He sat me down, looked me in the eye and said "I want to be gangster." I started laughing thinking he was joking. He was 100% serious. FML

by hatboxghost / 07/09/2009 at 1:17am / United States / Love

Today, my dad woke me up by shaking me and saying "If you're not up in two minutes, I'm lighting a firecracker in your room." Thinking he wouldn't possibly set off a firecracker in the house, much less my room, I decided to call his bluff. My room still smells like gunpowder. FML

by Singed / 07/04/2009 at 1:31pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got called to a biker bar to break up a fight between my parents. FML

by hot_mess88 / 07/04/2009 at 11:24am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met with a friend who had gained some weight since I saw him last. After a friendly hug, I put my hand on his new man boob and, without thinking, left it there way too long. I realized that I was groping him and, in a panic, did the only thing I could think of. I patted it. Twice. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 6:19pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking to work and saw three guys sitting at a table outside. One of the guys looks at me and says to his friends, "That's the girl that works at the grocery store. She replaced the hot chick." The other two guys glared at me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/19/2009 at 12:39pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the cafeteria of my school with my boyfriend and he dumped me. I was kinda expecting it. What I wasn't expecting was that he'd start running in front of everyone, screaming "FREEEEEEEEEDOM!" at the top of his lungs and that he'd kiss the first girl he saw. FML

by Anonymous / 06/12/2009 at 2:39am / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, was teacher appreciation day at my school. They played a slideshow of all the teachers. The students cheered wildly for every teacher. When my picture came up, nobody clapped. The whole room was quiet. FML

by Ignatius / 06/07/2009 at 3:21pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, someone left a note on my car, saying "You're gorgeous. Call me. #######." I called the number and they said they saw me in the store I was in, telling me "You were the ONLY attractive person in there." We decided to meet up. He walks over, I say hi, he says "I think I put my number on the wrong car." FML

by apparentlyunattractive / 06/07/2009 at 5:23am / United States / Miscellaneous