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evilegit

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evilegit

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 2 August 1997 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 498
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 3:06pm

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evilegit's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate and planning on having sex for the first time. I picked her up off the couch, and in so doing, accidentally lifted her too high, putting her head through the ceiling. She had a mild concussion. FML

#15921187
378 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36226) - you deserved it (18799)

On 04/25/2011 at 3:31pm - intimacy - by Ouch (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend said he wanted to try something new. By something new, it was to put flour in my butt and see what would happen if I farted. FML

#15281187
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45220) - you deserved it (7689)

On 03/12/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I woke up after a night out drinking on my sofa, with an electric dog collar around my neck and handcuffs on my wrists. The keys were on the other side of the invisible doggy fence. FML

#15154591
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13184) - you deserved it (34312)

On 02/28/2011 at 8:10pm - health - by stupiddrunk (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while presenting a project I've worked on for months, one of the professors exasperatedly cut in mid-sentence, saying, "Look, it's shit. Just stop already." FML

#14742599
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28259) - you deserved it (4048)

On 01/28/2011 at 12:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Slovakia (Bratislava)

Today, my daughter was expelled from her school for beating another kindergartener with a Dr. Seuss book. FML

#14567167
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32995) - you deserved it (6994)

On 01/13/2011 at 3:48pm - kids - by me - United States

Today, my husband invited a couple of his college friends over for dinner. While we were in the middle of eating, one of them asked loudly, "Hey, whatever happened to that fat bitch you dated in your third year?" We've been dating since his second year. FML

#14545720
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34388) - you deserved it (3297)

On 01/11/2011 at 2:06pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I asked my boyfriend to try and man up and act a bit tougher. He started crying. FML

#13881563
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32672) - you deserved it (17091)

On 11/17/2010 at 9:32pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, in my journalism class, after trying hard to find some actual news to comment, we ended up talking about gay porn and fashion designers. FML

#13863869
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9259) - you deserved it (17352)

On 11/16/2010 at 10:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Romania (Cluj)

Today, I was leaving the car wash when I saw my friend walking on the sidewalk. I pulled over next to her and asked if she wanted a ride. Only after getting a face full of the soda she was drinking did I realize I was talking to a complete stranger. FML

#13818357
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20589) - you deserved it (6656)

On 11/12/2010 at 7:24pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I was eating lunch at McDonald's when an older man sat down at the table next to me and told me I was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen. I'm a 20 year old man. FML

#13715432
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30202) - you deserved it (5282)

On 11/04/2010 at 3:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to the library to pick up Romeo and Juliet, for my English class. After looking around for half an hour, I asked the librarian. "I couldn't find Shakespeare anywhere. Where could I find him?" She quickly replied "He's dead", giggled to herself, and went back to her work. FML

#13599206
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23833) - you deserved it (8090)

On 10/26/2010 at 3:48am - misc - by skippy_liz (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I met my roommate for the first time. I walked in the door to see him in full Roman gladiator gear, screaming at the computer because he lost 18 knights. He also told me he wakes up every 3 hours to make sure his army is still intact. FML

#13521547
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35205) - you deserved it (2965)

On 10/20/2010 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boss told me that I'd confessed my love to him last night when he'd held my hair back as I puked. FML

#13510751
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9849) - you deserved it (30137)

On 10/19/2010 at 11:24am - work - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that the blind man I've been helping for months at the grocery store by carrying his shopping around and stuff was actually faking his blindness. FML

#13442719
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25524) - you deserved it (3281)

On 10/14/2010 at 4:19am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was conducting interviews and I could tell this particular candidate was really nervous, so I was extra nice. At the end, he was reluctant to shake my hand. On the way out I realised why: I had lost the top button on my low cut top, and he was nursing his appreciation of the view. FML

#13153381
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21048) - you deserved it (7501)

On 09/22/2010 at 4:49am - work - by pizzacat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



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