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evilegit

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evilegit

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 2 August 1997 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 496
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 3:06pm

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evilegit's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML

#17852902
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25577) - you deserved it (7784)

On 09/28/2011 at 12:55am - intimacy - by confused (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I had a lady come in to order a pizza. She wanted to use a free delivery coupon. After telling her several times that she couldn't use a free delivery coupon, unless she was having the pizza delivered, she told me I have horrible people skills. FML

#17728264
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27767) - you deserved it (2553)

On 09/12/2011 at 2:32pm - work - by pea - United States

Today, the girl I've been dating, and starting to fall in love with, walked out of the bathroom claiming we were going to be parents. I jumped off of the couch in disbelief, yelling, "Really?" She replied, "Really. I just gave birth to a huge dump baby." FML

#17718767
349 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39146) - you deserved it (7085)

On 09/11/2011 at 11:13am - misc - by CaseyFpC85 - United States (Florida)

Today, my child-hating friend who vowed never to have any no matter what, announced that she's pregnant. I've had three IVF cycles, spent $90k in fertility treatments, and still can't conceive. FML

#17646156
469 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45903) - you deserved it (4214)

On 09/02/2011 at 6:02pm - kids - by anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was DJing on a popular local radio station when a pop-up window appeared on the station's computer. Of all the possible sounds that could have played, it was a girl screaming in pleasure. It went out live on air. FML

#17635803
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31702) - you deserved it (5743)

On 09/01/2011 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by djfail - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I visited my son at work. He's an interpreter for the government. As I watched him converse with a group of men, I was overcome with pride. Then the woman next to me said "I can't believe they're talking about that in public." They were discussing masturbation techniques. FML

#17625902
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30736) - you deserved it (3368)

On 08/30/2011 at 11:30pm - intimacy - by mystupidson (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I took my Catholic girlfriend home to meet my family for the first time. My brother thought it would be civil to spend over an hour insulting her religion and explaining in detail the many ways in which "the Force" is superior. FML

#17521930
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27779) - you deserved it (5117)

On 08/19/2011 at 6:36pm - love - by Jace - United Kingdom (Aberdeen City)

Today, a man with a face like a corpse's shoe started talking to me in the long queue at the Post Office. Apparently, his mother invented the banana, and he's first in line for the throne in France if ever Prince Harry dies. And his breath smelled like Satan's ass gas. FML

#17496000
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27642) - you deserved it (3328)

On 08/17/2011 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I came to terms with the fact that my boss owns my soul for the bare minimum wage, and has me so whipped that he probably will for the rest of eternity, or until his ancient, withered, necromantic ass dies. FML

#17367681
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11100) - you deserved it (21613)

On 08/04/2011 at 2:47pm - work - by Username - United States

Today, I have to take medicine that gives me painful, violent farts. Tomorrow, I have to either get fired or go work in an office that's dead silent. How silent? Last week I heard my coworker drop a paperclip, three desks away. FML

#17305922
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35970) - you deserved it (3105)

On 07/30/2011 at 2:58am - work - by Tootie (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

#17194109
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47969) - you deserved it (7805)

On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States

Today, my parents think that I don't realize all the sexual euphemisms in their conversations. One of the more recent ones being made by my dad at the dinner table: "This sausage is great, honey, but mine is bigger and tastier!" FML

#17094831
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42203) - you deserved it (3535)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:16pm - intimacy - by wittlegirl - United States (California)

Today, I went to the park with a girl I like. She got playful and climbed a tree, insisting I come up, too. While we were sitting and enjoying the view, she suddenly knocked me off the branch, sending me crashing to the ground. FML

#17044737
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33841) - you deserved it (5629)

On 07/09/2011 at 8:13pm - love - by wolf boy - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was accused of cheating on my wife when an earring was found in our car. I knew it was my mom's missing earring but she didn't believe me. After calling my mom and getting them on the phone to clarify, my wife is upset I told my mother at all. Now I'm not a cheater, just an asshole. FML

#16954245
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41059) - you deserved it (3510)

On 07/02/2011 at 10:15pm - love - by lostbandana - United States

Today, I once again told my son he needed a job and a girlfriend because I simply could not keep him in my house anymore. He yelled, "No, I can do whatever I want!" Then went back to playing video games. He's 38. FML

#15960842
365 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28878) - you deserved it (41317)

On 04/28/2011 at 7:07am - kids - by oldmama728 -



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