Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

evanescence

Offline (the 03/01/2014 at 8:13am) | Search for a member

evanescence

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 76567
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 108 posted

About evanescence : I totally haven't posted 108 FMLs LOL I don't know why my account says I have!!

Okay guys, I used to share this account with my best guy friend. 2 of my FML posts have been confirmed, both say as a man. I AM A GIRL, the one about my brother was me, the other one was my friend. He doesn't use this website anymore so he stopped coming on this account, and I use it rarely.

Anyways, I love Evanescence and I love people who love Evanescence.

evanescence's page activity

Visits<b>Bob3332</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 9:26pm<b>hpoxx</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 2:06pm<b>ZmeyCyanide</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 9:40pm<b>PrincessCastiel</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 12:07am<b>xLIGHTS</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 11:50pm<b>Rag_dollxx</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 8:17pm<b>elmatador615</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 10:55am<b>avealoe</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 2:36am<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 4:02pm<b>RawrImaDragon</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 3:49am<b>insanez58</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 11:05pm<b>CaptainFoxbutt</b> - the 06/23/2013 at 11:25pm<b>Kenton1008</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 7:36pm<b>purplexpinapple</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 2:32am<b>Wedees</b> - the 02/04/2013 at 11:41pm<b>missalice0306</b> - the 08/21/2012 at 3:37pm<b>DebbieKaysen</b> - the 04/06/2012 at 3:30am<b>leero234</b> - the 01/22/2012 at 4:32pm

evanescence's FML badges

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of evanescence's badges

evanescence's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend dumped me so he could sleep with my mom without feeling guilty. FML

#7304423
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32589) - you deserved it (2827)

On 01/12/2010 at 6:54pm - intimacy - by notasgood (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I took my wife and newborn baby girl home from the hospital. While waiting for the elevator, an elderly couple leaned over, saw our baby, and said, "Look, it's the fat kid that was in the nursery." My baby is six and a half pounds, and my wife hasn't stopped crying. FML

#7296814
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34341) - you deserved it (2364)

On 01/12/2010 at 8:10am - kids - by mickey1928 -

Today, at a bar, a woman approched me and tried to set me up with her friend. Looking around, the only people in the bar were a man reading the paper and a very ugly woman, looking at me and smiling. I worriedly replied, "I'm sorry, but I'm gay." Turns out her friend was the one reading the paper. FML

#7295909
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10254) - you deserved it (36584)

On 01/12/2010 at 5:26am - love - by awkward23 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my friends let me win at strip poker so I wouldn't take off my clothes. FML

#7293209
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30416) - you deserved it (5752)

On 01/12/2010 at 12:42am - misc - by Absent - France

Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML

#7290118
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27707) - you deserved it (3695)

On 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by brileyyyy - United States (Missouri)

Today, I walked in on my parents necking in the living room. I promptly covered my eyes and muttered something about my innocence being stolen from me. My dad looked up from the couch, and mentioned that he had heard my innocence being stolen by Jake, my boyfriend from 2 years ago. FML

#7287898
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8017) - you deserved it (34667)

On 01/11/2010 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML

#7264308
183 comments

Today, I realized that I will never be able to buy the car I've wanted since middle school. The car? A greyish-silver Volvo, which is the make and color of car Kurt Cobain drove. The reason? I've been informed that it's also the make and color of the car that Edward Cullen drives in Twilight. FML

#7264134
385 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32052) - you deserved it (9557)

On 01/10/2010 at 8:04pm - misc - by coinoperatedgirl (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out that last summer while my girlfriend worked on a Disney Cruise ship, she cheated on me with Tarzan. FML

#7261053
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33272) - you deserved it (2623)

On 01/10/2010 at 4:47pm - misc - by daragnan (man) - United States

Today, I lost my virginity to my long time boyfriend and found out I'm severely allergic to latex. I also found out that my family doctor had been transferred to the ER. He went to play golf with my dad later. FML

#7257583
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17711) - you deserved it (2879)

On 01/10/2010 at 12:36pm - intimacy - by Foxy (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I realized why my bathroom has been smelling so bad. My 10-year-old son has been peeing on the radiator, thinking it's fun to watch it steam and sizzle. FML

#7257345
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31110) - you deserved it (2775)

On 01/10/2010 at 12:17pm - kids - by Amber (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to dinner with my mom and her new boyfriend. At the restaurant, while we were eating, he started clapping and singing "if you're happy and you know it." My mom joined in. And they sang loudly. Loud enough for the entire restaurant to go quiet and stare. FML

#7247927
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26334) - you deserved it (2573)

On 01/09/2010 at 11:29pm - misc - by 1thapp3ns (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was in a rush to get to the toilet, I went in and sat on the seat. Then I felt a stinging pain on my left bum cheek. I jumped up quickly to see a wasp splashing around in the bowl. It stung me, and now have a bum cheek twice its normal size, and pee all over my pants. FML

#7243511
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25732) - you deserved it (2888)

On 01/09/2010 at 8:23pm - animals - by targetlove (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML

#7232950
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19161) - you deserved it (5150)

On 01/09/2010 at 8:25am - intimacy - by ohdeargodthatswrong (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was awoken at 1:30am by a strange noise, and something tugging on my hair. I opened my eyes, to find a very large rat sitting on my pillow, chewing my hair. FML

#7231229
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43073) - you deserved it (2862)

On 01/09/2010 at 3:40am - misc - by Fran (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: