eusue

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eusue

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 July 1976 (40 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1190
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About eusue : POTATO

eusue's page activity

Visits<b>olpally</b> - the 07/03/2013 at 4:10pm<b>GingerFishy</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 2:35am<b>Smartdumbblonde</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 6:14pm<b>incendiaaa</b> - the 02/26/2013 at 2:11pm<b>Exotic_Nihilism</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 4:46pm<b>coleiab125</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 2:35pm<b>Bubule</b> - the 02/21/2013 at 12:42pm<b>hoffmanam</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 7:48am

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eusue's favorite FMLs

Today, my son threw the biggest fit in history about going to the dentist. He broke a whole stack of plates, overflowed the bathtub, let the dog loose, and kicked his father when he tried to calm him down. My son is 17. FML

by Anonymous / 02/06/2013 at 6:12am / United States / Kids

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

by NewlyDread / 02/05/2013 at 9:31pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I found out my boyfriend sleeps on a Princess Leia pillow. He's 22. FML

by Anonymous / 02/05/2013 at 5:59pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML

by Brock / 02/02/2013 at 4:20pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love

Today, my boyfriend tried to hypnotize me into breaking up with him. FML

by theawfulpresent / 01/29/2013 at 7:28pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I led a class of grade-two pupils on an excursion to the zoo. When we went to see the lions I was put in a position where I had to explain to seven and eight year olds why one lion was "bouncing" on top of the other one. FML

by teacher / 01/25/2013 at 12:25am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, I waited over 30 minutes in freezing cold weather for my bus. When it finally arrived, I went to get on board, but slipped and fell on the icy ground. The driver waited a whole 2 seconds before snorting, "Ain't nobody got time for this shit", closing the doors, and driving off. FML

by frozensolid / 01/24/2013 at 4:25pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Transportation

Today, the drummer of my band briefly mentioned something about not being allowed into the United States, just as he left our last practice before our big tour in America. FML

by musicalrose_21 / 01/20/2013 at 7:27am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend on the bathroom floor, I felt something tickle my balls. I looked back to see her sister's kitten getting in on the action. I think I just had my first threesome. FML

by Drewbie / 01/13/2013 at 3:53am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, my partner was inspired by 50 Shades Of Grey to try making me orgasm with a full bladder, therefore intensifying the experience. He was right, it was mind blowing. It also made me piss the bed for the first time in twenty-odd years. FML

by wetsheets / 01/07/2013 at 8:01am / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend using my hand to wank. FML

by kmtranter / 12/28/2012 at 6:40am / United Kingdom (Brent) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

by Saradee / 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I dyed my naturally-blonde hair dark brown. Upon seeing me, my boyfriend immediately wanted to have sex, because I now remind him of his favourite porn star. FML

by brunetteshavemorefun / 12/22/2012 at 12:56pm / United Kingdom (Lancashire) / Intimacy

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

by anonymaiacciu / 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm / France / Intimacy

Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML

by MoreActionThanMe / 12/10/2012 at 7:04pm / United States / Animals