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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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escapeofthedoll

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escapeofthedoll
  • Town/Country : London, United Kingdom
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 10 February 1991 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 257
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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escapeofthedoll's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575 (279)

I agree, your life sucks (36712) - you deserved it (10618)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found a camera someone left at our house. I looked at the pictures, and saw my grandma in a sexy outfit. FML

#6480509 (59)

I agree, your life sucks (14709) - you deserved it (3708)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my grandma went to get my twin sister and I a birthday gift. She returned with 2 shirts that read "I see you've met the twins" in big letters across the chest. She gave them to us and said, "Isn't this cute, cause you're twins!" I then had to explain to her what the shirt was actually referring to. FML

#4530948 (162)

I agree, your life sucks (38045) - you deserved it (2634)

On 08/14/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by twingirl (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was watching an animal behavior movie. All of a sudden, it brings up two snails going at it. I got hard watching it. FML

#1751359 (275)

I agree, your life sucks (61709) - you deserved it (32814)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:51pm - intimacy - by stpdaziandude (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

#279733 (543)

I agree, your life sucks (35964) - you deserved it (225423)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I went to get a condom because my boyfriend and I were going to have sex for the first time. When I opened the drawer, I saw that every single condom had a Jesus pin stabbed through it, and a note on top of the box: "love mom." FML

#126669 (328)

I agree, your life sucks (96634) - you deserved it (16769)

On 02/24/2009 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my lesbian sister enthusiastically showed me her new strap on. Not only does she get more girls than me, she now has a bigger penis too. FML

#60108 (107)

I agree, your life sucks (54347) - you deserved it (3804)

On 02/17/2009 at 10:27am - misc - by stillsingleladies (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidentally sent it to my dad and got a text back saying, "You definitely take after your mom." FML

#9520 (131)

I agree, your life sucks (28314) - you deserved it (46793)

On 02/05/2009 at 9:09am - intimacy - by ruffrider (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend gave me a blow-up doll and told me to practice. FML

#8816 (52)

I agree, your life sucks (40458) - you deserved it (13595)

On 02/04/2009 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by PlayTag (man) - United States (California)

Today, Father Christmas touched my ass in a shopping mall. I'm a bit worried about what's going to happen on Christmas Day. FML

#559 (33)

I agree, your life sucks (11452) - you deserved it (1107)

On 12/21/2008 at 12:04am - misc - by Loola - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had sex with a girl who cried out as she came "Forgive me Lord! Forgive me Lord!" FML

#552 (136)

I agree, your life sucks (40862) - you deserved it (4386)

On 12/19/2008 at 11:05am - intimacy - by chicochico - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was jacking off casually to a picture of my ex-girlfriend, when all of the sudden, my friend sends me an IM picture of a granny bending over which pops up on my screen. I think my sex life is ruined forever. FML

#539 (76)

I agree, your life sucks (11386) - you deserved it (17846)

On 12/17/2008 at 11:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)



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