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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, after eight months of unemployment, I finally started at my new night job. Shortly after walking in, my boss came up behind me, whispered "hooorse dicksss" in my ear, and walked off without another word. I am beyond terrified. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16731) - you deserved it (1171)
On 09/29/2012 at 8:11pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Today, I realized that something's wrong when you have to go to a mental hospital for a family reunion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18397) - you deserved it (1180)
On 03/28/2012 at 10:53pm - misc - by neverthesame - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I got asked out for the second time in my life. Since my first date didn't go so well I thought I might have better luck with a different guy. I had to end the date when he confessed it was his destiny to kill his father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24477) - you deserved it (1680)
On 02/25/2012 at 1:33am - misc - by BadGuyLuck (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I saw my dad sitting in the car alone, blaring classical music, blowing up beach balls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15868) - you deserved it (2556)
On 12/22/2011 at 9:58pm - misc - by bellerz14 - United States
Today, I went to a club. The only guy who asked me to dance introduced himself as "Bird Dog." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18682) - you deserved it (2322)
On 08/26/2011 at 3:35am - love - by EpicMayonnaise (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, in health class, I raised my hand and asked if you could get an STD from dogs. I have officially now ruined any extremely small chance I had of being popular. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8020) - you deserved it (52693)
On 07/30/2011 at 12:38am - animals - by loser4life - United States (Colorado)
Today, my husband was kind enough to hold my hair back while I was going down on him, but didn't have the thought to comfort me this morning while I suffered the effects of morning sickness. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22561) - you deserved it (3785)
On 01/02/2011 at 4:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I'm at work as a security guard. At a morgue. Why am I here? FML
I agree, your life sucks (20715) - you deserved it (4222)
On 11/18/2010 at 10:04pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I walked into my bedroom, only to find out that my bed is missing. I have no idea where it is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34118) - you deserved it (426)
On 08/04/2010 at 1:18am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job, which was great, until she started saying "milk the penis... miiiiilk the penis." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39360) - you deserved it (10319)
On 05/21/2010 at 11:46am - intimacy - by mperrotta913 (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31856) - you deserved it (2160)
On 11/24/2009 at 6:44am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)
Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling "who's your daddy" at his plate of barbecue, and my mom just sat there with that, "what the hell happened to my life" look on her face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53013) - you deserved it (2692)
On 09/13/2009 at 5:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I found a box of birthday candles sitting on the coffee table. Bored, I lit one, and after a minute I threw it away and sat back down on the couch. I started looking at the box and noticed that it said "Magic Re-Lighting Candles" at the exact moment that my trash can burst into flames. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21424) - you deserved it (54869)
On 05/04/2009 at 4:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend was wearing a new shirt he had bought over the weekend. It was really cute and I always borrow his shirts so I asked to borrow his new one. He replied with, "Okay but please don't stretch this one." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40578) - you deserved it (12011)
On 04/27/2009 at 10:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
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