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epicfail13337

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epicfail13337

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 28 September 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3940
  • Number of comments : 114
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About epicfail13337 : Herp derp.

epicfail13337's page activity

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epicfail13337's FML badges

Beginner

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Consolation prize

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epicfail13337's favorite FMLs

Today, I was checking out a gorgeous woman in spandex with beautiful flowing long black hair on the treadmill at the gym. I spent a few minutes just watching her body move and ripple under the material. She turned off the treadmill and got off, only for me to find out that it was a guy. FML

#8512491
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10733) - you deserved it (40004)

On 02/21/2010 at 10:16am - love - by anonymous - United States

Today, in a sporting goods store, my mom walked over to the other side of the store, when a cute guy came over to talk to me. When she saw this she grabbed a bat, walked over to us and said "If you ever even look at my daughter again, I will beat you shitless." She was serious. He ran. FML

#8354648
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29583) - you deserved it (2215)

On 02/16/2010 at 9:54pm - misc - by batter--up (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while at a bar a woman of about 40 came up to me and asked me to dance, and being only 20 I thought I had met the perfect "cougar" for a one night stand. After a few up-beat dances, a slower song came on and we continued to dance. She started sobbing and claimed I was the son she never had. FML

#7334012
83 comments

Today, I overheard my parents discussing whether or not they could trust me being alone in the house for 2 days. They then came to the decision that I'm too unpopular and unattractive to ever throw a wild party or get laid. FML

#7156329
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33020) - you deserved it (2841)

On 01/05/2010 at 12:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was watching the show "Sixteen and Pregnant". I started bawling when the girl's dirtbag boyfriend proposed to her with a $20 ring he bought from Walmart because I was so lonely and was jealous of her "romantic relationship". FML

#6770582
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25062) - you deserved it (11071)

On 12/15/2009 at 10:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I spoke with my boyfriend's crazy ex-girlfriend. Actually, she isn't all that crazy. He really did cheat on her with half a dozen other girls. The same girls he's apparently cheating on me with. How do I know for sure? Thank you crazy ex for his email passwords. FML

#6521538
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41699) - you deserved it (4540)

On 11/29/2009 at 9:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I made out with a guy that I had just met at a party. It was my first kiss. I don't know what's worse, the fact that my first kiss is at the age of 23, or the fact that I saw him making out with a different girl later on in the night. FML

#6506969
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30440) - you deserved it (14909)

On 11/29/2009 at 1:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I parked my convertible in the 5 minute bay at the post office. When I came back out I noticed a bum in the front seat pretending to drive it. After shouting at him and pulling him out, he stumbled off. I was then slapped with a ticket for being parked longer than 5 minutes. FML

#6309231
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24906) - you deserved it (5412)

On 11/15/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by John (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm majoring in Chinese, I could understand what they were talking about. Too bad none of his friends knew that, and talked about banging me while I was sitting there. FML

#5518308
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27051) - you deserved it (3349)

On 09/27/2009 at 11:16pm - intimacy - by NiHao (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I got a call from a prominent orchestra asking me to play with them. They were especially interested because I'm still in high school. I called to accept only to find out that my mother had already declined the offer for me because I "only" have a 3.7. FML

#5403553
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41981) - you deserved it (2392)

On 09/21/2009 at 9:50pm - work - by bass (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized the guy I've been hooking up with has a daughter who is a year younger than me. As if that wasn't bad enough, I also found out she had a child of her own. I've been hooking up with a grandpa. FML

#5254272
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23761) - you deserved it (39257)

On 09/14/2009 at 5:11pm - misc - by nen_00 - United States (Iowa)

Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML

#5148313
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (181068) - you deserved it (18909)

On 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I played a goth character in my friend's student film with goth clothes, lip ring, eyeliner, etc. We went into Starbucks at break and an elderly man came up to me and said "Your kind is the reason for all the bad stuff in this world" and then spat in my $5 drink. FML

#5141250
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42076) - you deserved it (4866)

On 09/09/2009 at 12:15am - misc - by comet5002 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I wanted to make love with my boyfriend for the first time. I wanted everything to be perfect. The CD kept skipping, the rose petals had ants all over them, and he couldn't get it up. FML

#5011183
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49186) - you deserved it (12361)

On 09/02/2009 at 11:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I received a text message from my favorite sister saying "Great news! The technology in condoms has improved so much that they ensure that accidents like you won't ever happen again!" Today's my birthday. FML

#4978107
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43913) - you deserved it (8220)

On 09/01/2009 at 3:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)



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