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eore

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eore

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 153
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About eore : I love animals and moustaches I play hockey soccer football volleyball basketball

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eore's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML

#20982965
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50593) - you deserved it (5301)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my mother came over to my apartment for a surprise visit. It wasn't until after she left that I realized that I left a half empty bottle of adult toy cleaner on the counter in the bathroom. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when his condom came off inside of me. We couldn't get it out, so I had to tell my mom, who didn't know we were sexually active, and then go to the ER. After an unsuccessful visit, we came home only to find the condom in my sheets. FML

#20889434
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49974) - you deserved it (33747)

On 09/20/2013 at 9:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, as I started my car, I heard the most horrific sounds coming from the engine. When I lifted the hood I realized I'd found my son's cat. FML

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

#20876988
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49397) - you deserved it (3941)

On 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm - animals - by ugh Buck! (woman) - United States

Today, I started my new internship at a vet clinic. By the end of the day I had: been peed on, scratched, forced to stuff a dead dog into a plastic bag, thrown up and almost passed out. I need to rethink my future career. FML

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML

#20864719
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45095) - you deserved it (19203)

On 09/02/2013 at 3:22pm - animals - by aherdofpigs - United States

Today, I did something I'd always wanted to do: I went swimming with dolphins. It was really fun, until I went to kiss the dolphin, and she slipped her tongue half into my mouth. FML

#20849713
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42340) - you deserved it (13649)

On 08/22/2013 at 6:45pm - animals - by violated ._. (woman) - United States

Today, my wackjob roommate decided to sit next to me on the couch, basically make out with her pet rabbit, and baby-talk to it. Key highlights involved giggling while the bunny licked up inside her nose and then commenting on the rabbit's "pronounced nipples". Why? FML

#20848347
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38716) - you deserved it (3471)

On 08/21/2013 at 8:09pm - animals - by Jade (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I caught my 16-year-old daughter and her boyfriend trying to use a latex glove as a condom. FML

#20735858
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53198) - you deserved it (8393)

On 06/19/2013 at 7:40pm - intimacy - by whatno - United States (Texas)

Today, I was planning on having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, so I asked my roomate to stay out of our apartment. About half-way through, my roomate blared "The Eye of the Tiger" from the other side of the door. My girlfriend laughed so hard that we couldn't finish. FML

#20733192
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56747) - you deserved it (7979)

On 06/18/2013 at 12:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML

#20720590
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34700) - you deserved it (71442)

On 06/11/2013 at 11:06pm - intimacy - by instinct (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I walked in on my dad masturbating to a nude photo of my mum on the computer. She passed away four years ago. FML

#20713899
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67836) - you deserved it (12763)

On 06/08/2013 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bromley)

Today, I had to pee in my cat's litter box, just to avoid witnessing my mom having sex in the living room on my way to the bathroom. FML

#20702750
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71933) - you deserved it (5752)

On 06/03/2013 at 1:47am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was sending some dirty texts to my boyfriend, when I heard a knocking sound coming through the wall. I sat there for ten minutes before I realized I was listening to my mom and her boyfriend having sex. FML

#20698016
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47923) - you deserved it (5929)

On 05/31/2013 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Guatemala (Guatemala)



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