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ennamae17's FML badges
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ennamae17's favorite FMLs
Today, my fiancé has decided to become my cat's personal trainer. This includes talking to the cat, attempting to motivate him to run up and down the stairs and telling the cat to call him "Coach Daddy". I now have a crazy fiancé and a very angry cat. FML
by oh.geez / 02/05/2012 at 3:00am / United States / Animals
by Jayde / 02/04/2012 at 12:12am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML
by coleslaw / 02/03/2012 at 12:25am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend gave me twelve roses and told me that he would love me until the last one dies. Remembering the Facebook like, I began looking for the fake one but couldn't find it. When I pointed out that all twelve were real and would die within days, he responded, "Exactly." FML
by Shelly P. / 01/28/2012 at 7:10pm / United States (Colorado) / Love
by ParkerRommel / 01/26/2012 at 10:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/26/2012 at 11:45am / United States (Rhode Island) / Health
by nacho / 01/24/2012 at 1:42am / United States (California) / Love
by suckstobefat / 01/22/2012 at 1:10am / Canada (Alberta) / Health
Today, I watched The Omen with my father. Halfway through driving me back home, he stopped the car and made me get out right there in a rough part of town. Fifteen minutes later, he drove up beside me, laughed hysterically at how terrified I was, and told me to get in. FML
by Anonymous / 01/20/2012 at 7:55pm / United States (New York) / Transportation
Today, while looking in the mirror at my full-blown grease-spewing acne-riddled face, my father came up behind me and said, "Don't worry son, I had acne like that when I was your age". I replied, "No you didn't", and his immediate response while laughing was, "No, I didn't." FML
by harshdoobie / 01/18/2012 at 10:18am / Canada / Health
by lolwtfbbq444 / 01/15/2012 at 5:24am / Australia / Miscellaneous
by Anon / 01/12/2012 at 8:34am / Australia (Queensland) / Health
Today, after 3 hours in a cramped car with my family, we stopped at a gas station. I got out of the car and the first words out of my mouth were, "It feels so good to be able to walk!" That's when I noticed the elderly man sitting in a wheelchair only a few meters away. FML
by VerbalDiarrhea / 01/08/2012 at 2:34am / United States (Nevada) / Transportation
by musicislife1337 / 01/08/2012 at 2:24am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I hit a new low point in my life when I stole batteries from a toy at the daycare I work at,… Today, I had a panic attack because my boyfriend thought it would be sexy to choke me in the middle… Today, my girlfriend and I were watching TV. She starts to undo my belt buckle, unzips my fly and…
- Today, I’m a French teacher in Ukraine, and in class we were debating gun legislation. In order to… Today, I’m a bus driver in Paris. A guy got on with a sheep. I told him that you can’t take the bus… Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because…