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emz89

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emz89

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 432
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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emz89's page activity

Visits<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 8:59pm

emz89's FML badges

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emz89's favorite FMLs

Today, I and a policeman confronted my psychotic neighbor who stole my cat because she thinks flea bites cause cancer. She refused to tell us what she'd done with the cat. I just spent $100 last month in vet bills, and my kids are crying for their pet. He's probably in pieces in her freezer. FML

#18249265
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37909) - you deserved it (2265)

On 11/14/2011 at 7:46pm - animals - by Stalked (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML

#18239656
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15095) - you deserved it (52653)

On 11/13/2011 at 5:46pm - misc - by shootme - Canada

Today, the guy I've recently started seeing confided that he's relieved I'm on the heavier side, and that he has a thing for watching chubby women eat. I just reached my ideal weight after losing 40 pounds. FML

#18238622
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33594) - you deserved it (3641)

On 11/13/2011 at 3:50pm - love - by notfatanymore (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, my elderly neighbor called the police because my cat was in her yard. I now have a citation and a court date. Apparently, there is a leash law for cats in my town, and it is taken very seriously. FML

#18100684
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25664) - you deserved it (5272)

On 10/29/2011 at 12:51am - animals - by Fought The Law - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at work when I found an iPhone on the floor. I decided not to turn it into the manager and keep it. Five minutes later, a customer asked if anyone had turned in her missing phone. I said no and began to walk away, when her friend called her phone. It rang. She recognized the ringtone. FML

#18086269
521 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10038) - you deserved it (182340)

On 10/27/2011 at 1:01am - work - by charlie3289 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, working as an EMT on an ambulance, we had a patient who refused to accept that he had a massive GI bleed, despite the fact that bloody stool was flowing from his anus all over my ambulance. To make things worse, my EMT ride-along student puked all over the patient. FML

#18069219
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27991) - you deserved it (1895)

On 10/25/2011 at 12:30am - work - by fire1 (man) - United States (California)

Today, marks the fourth straight night that my girlfriend has screamed and cried in fear, scratching and kicking me in her sleep. The reason? I took her to see Paranormal Activity 3. FML

#18061589
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14922) - you deserved it (46159)

On 10/24/2011 at 5:47am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was on a drive with my uncle. We saw a dead deer on the side of the road and expressed our pity for it. Then a squirrel runs across the road and my uncle swerves toward the squirrel, laughing hysterically and yelling, "Run rodent run." FML

#17965176
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24767) - you deserved it (3754)

On 10/12/2011 at 1:14am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was pulled over by the police. The cop was my ex-boyfriend. He had no legitimate reason to pull me over, so he thoroughly checked my car. He gave me a defect notice and a fine. What for? A broken door lock, on my rear passenger door. FML

#17927232
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31164) - you deserved it (3997)

On 10/07/2011 at 11:07am - misc - by jkass - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a business man in his forties tackled me to the ground in an attempt to take my seat on a crowded train. When that didn't work, he called me a fat bitch and gave me the finger. The seat was given up for me because I'm seven months pregnant. FML

#17017856
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53316) - you deserved it (3100)

On 07/07/2011 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I had to go to a birthday party for 10 year old triplets. They've all been dead for more than 9 years. FML

#16755181
389 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39750) - you deserved it (5974)

On 06/20/2011 at 12:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to be the one to break it to my daughter that WWE fighting was staged. She began crying. However, last month she didn't shed a single tear at her grandmother's funeral. FML

#16655787
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35979) - you deserved it (5113)

On 06/14/2011 at 2:08am - kids - by mk (woman) - United States (Texas)



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