emilyraenewman

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emilyraenewman

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 November 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 533
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About emilyraenewman : I'm Emily and I'm 17. I live in a small town on Vancouver island. Message me :)

emilyraenewman's page activity

Visits<b>drunkmunkey</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 2:06pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 6:23am<b>Woody02284</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 2:29pm<b>itssnotfunny</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 8:01pm<b>unicorn_hump</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 4:12pm<b>JRT1393</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 1:35pm<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 11:48pm<b>mcdekree</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 10:01pm<b>steveno5000</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 3:49am<b>hoffmanam</b> - the 12/22/2012 at 12:04pm<b>danielle25</b> - the 11/28/2012 at 6:20pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 11/01/2012 at 9:11pm<b>heyy17</b> - the 10/08/2012 at 9:04am<b>stevegronowski</b> - the 10/06/2011 at 5:08am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:18pm<b>soccertrick61</b> - the 09/01/2011 at 10:03am<b>JERZBornNRaised</b> - the 08/26/2011 at 7:21pm<b>TheMasticater</b> - the 08/26/2011 at 7:55am

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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emilyraenewman's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to "trip" and fall into this guy I've had a crush on. I missed and fell on my face. He stepped over me and kept walking. FML

by clumsy / 05/06/2013 at 8:45pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, the girl that I've been madly in love with was demanding I tell her who I liked. I told her no, I should just keep it a secret, but she demanded I tell her. After I told her, the only response I got was, "You're right. You should have kept that a secret." FML

by walkingdead_1029 / 05/06/2013 at 2:49am / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, I overheard the guy I like talking to one of his friends about me. His friend asked if he and I were dating, to which he replied, "No way, dude. I have standards." FML

by Anonymous / 04/20/2013 at 7:08pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I was the victim of a drive-by egging by some bastard riding a segway. He still got away. FML

by Anonymous / 04/19/2013 at 9:16pm / New Zealand / Transportation

Today, I told the guy I've liked since we were children that I'm madly in love with him. He replied with, "Aw, I love you too, as a sister." I was speechless. He patted me on the back and said, "Better luck next time." FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2013 at 7:08pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show my dad a picture on my phone, my boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but you can expect a few inches tonight." FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2013 at 1:39am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my ex-boyfriend, with whom I'm still madly in love, called me and begged me to come back to him. In shock, I asked, "Is this some kind of joke?" He giggled, said yes, and then promptly hung up. FML

by Anonymous / 04/15/2013 at 10:20pm / United States / Love

Today, my social teacher thought it would be a great idea to have a casual debate about Margaret Thatcher and her legacy. Within 10 minutes, the entire class was yelling, screaming, throwing stuff at each other. I got hit in the face with a binder. FML

by great idea / 04/10/2013 at 8:40pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2013 at 12:28am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

by anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy

Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML

by Susan / 03/18/2013 at 4:59am / Ireland / Intimacy

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

by intheairtonight / 04/25/2012 at 2:22am / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I don't understand the bond between him and his stuffed goose. He's 36. FML

by Anonymous / 02/15/2012 at 12:18am / United States / Love

Today, the girl I have a crush on texted me to go out tonight. When I got to her house, she peered at me quizzically and asked, "What do you want? Did I text you?" FML

by hudd357mag / 02/06/2012 at 12:35am / United States / Love