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emilyjgraham

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emilyjgraham

6Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6320
  • Number of comments : 762
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About emilyjgraham : I didn't realise I'd comment as often as I do otherwise I wouldn't have created such an obvious username... I'm just a bellend.
I'm quite rubbish at responding to messages, please bear with! :)

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Liked!<b>KatlynBrooke</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 7:59am<b>RA91</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 2:39pm<b>Zx_MaSsAcRe_xZ</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 11:20pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 12:03pm<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 3:47pm<b>chicken_noodle</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 6:29pm

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emilyjgraham's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a really important job interview. During it, I accidentally let out a burp, came down with nervous hiccups, and when I tried to quietly ease out some painful gas that was building up, it came out as a massive, rancid fart. I'll definitely be unemployed for a while yet. FML

#20898243
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41375) - you deserved it (9390)

On 09/27/2013 at 5:33pm - work - by ;_;" (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, I called work crying, telling them that I wouldn't be able to go to work tomorrow due to my grandmother's sudden and tragic death. After hanging up, I walked into the midnight release of Grand Theft Auto 5. I had no idea my boss was also an avid gamer. FML

#20884742
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18046) - you deserved it (89035)

On 09/17/2013 at 12:36am - work - by fired (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my doctor asked me to undo my bra so he could check my breathing without the straps restricting my lungs, I got home and told my friends how awkward it was. Not one of them has had this happen to them before. We all go to the same doctor. FML

#20883308
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53865) - you deserved it (4951)

On 09/16/2013 at 12:35am - health - by chestycough - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I arrived at my college dorm. To help me sleep, I listened to my local radio from my phone. Little did I know, they turn off the wifi for part of the night, and hours of music were streamed onto my phone. Guess who now owes the phone company all my money. FML

#20868766
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43541) - you deserved it (11070)

On 09/05/2013 at 11:49am - money - by OweLotsaMoney - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I are on camping vacation. On my way out of the tent, I stepped in a pile of shit. When I told him, he said, "Oh, I couldn't make it to the bathroom last night." The bathroom was a minute walk from our tent. FML

Today, my 12-year-old son was shot in the foot. After hours of not talking, including to the police, he finally told us that his friend accidentally shot him with his dad's gun, and that he didn't want to say anything because he didn't want to "lose any street cred by snitching." FML

#20836449
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50675) - you deserved it (6201)

On 08/14/2013 at 12:26am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to get my hair done. The hairdresser managed to catch my eyebrow piercing in his comb and almost rip it out. I now look like I have a gunshot wound on the upper right hand side of my face. I'm getting married in a matter of hours, and I still had to pay £100 for the hair cut. FML

#20831030
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42883) - you deserved it (13636)

On 08/10/2013 at 5:55pm - misc - by ouchbrow (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I took my driving test. As I was about to turn at a green light, a car sped toward us from the other direction, running a red light. My instructor failed me because I stopped to avoid getting rammed. Apparently I should have kept going, because it was my right of way. FML

#20830853
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60028) - you deserved it (3221)

On 08/10/2013 at 3:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, a kid was ranting that "people these days are so rude" and that "things were much better in the '50s." Annoyed, I asked the delusional twat what was so great about the racial segregation, rampant sexism, homophobia, and all the rest back then. He responded by punching me. FML

#20792660
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44041) - you deserved it (14445)

On 07/19/2013 at 4:36pm - health - by "people these days" (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was browsing porn in my room, when my dad barged in. I quickly switched to another tab, only to see it was parked on another porn page. I had another browser window open, so I switched to that. More porn. My dad said, "Riiiggghhhttt... You need help, son." FML

#20779957
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28012) - you deserved it (54930)

On 07/13/2013 at 1:22pm - misc - by fuck (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to make a R.I.P. page for me on Facebook. Most liked post? "Too bad this page is fake." FML

#20771326
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43766) - you deserved it (4907)

On 07/08/2013 at 10:02pm - misc - by the hated - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had a dream about marrying Hitler. I've had this same dream three times now. My subconscious is starting to scare me. FML

#20766565
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45678) - you deserved it (4715)

On 07/06/2013 at 3:11am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old son apparently practicing his oral sex skills on the crotch of one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML

#20765717
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51145) - you deserved it (4871)

On 07/05/2013 at 6:45pm - kids - by The fuck, junior? (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I had to remove a glass bottle, complete with an ineffective pullstring, from a patient's rectum. He claimed that he'd accidentally sat on it, and later threatened to sue me for every penny if I breathed a word of it to anyone. Oops, looks like I just did. FML

#20752893
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49947) - you deserved it (5748)

On 06/28/2013 at 5:59pm - work - by DocKreso (man) - Croatia (Splitsko-Dalmatinska)

Today, after months of incredibly painful stomach cramps, I convinced my mom that I needed to see a doctor. Not even 2 minutes into the exam, the doctor tells me that I'm heavily constipated and advised some "prune juice" to help "clear all that shit out". My mom won't stop laughing at me. FML

#20751604
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40783) - you deserved it (5200)

On 06/27/2013 at 11:57pm - health - by Anonymous - United States



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