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ellieweezer

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ellieweezer
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 79
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ellieweezer's favorite FMLs

Today, my son, who seems to think that he is a "gangsta" despite being a white boy from the suburbs, cried because I accidentally burned his grilled cheese. He's 28. FML

#20045566
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27679) - you deserved it (5416)

On 08/28/2012 at 12:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while watching the Olympics, my father found it completely necessary to make a farting sound every single time an athlete jumps or bends over. This will be a very long few weeks. FML

#19995451
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15751) - you deserved it (1666)

On 07/31/2012 at 10:49pm - misc - by joleezad5 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I defended the dried up things in the cup noodles as being real vegetables, just so that it would appear that I do actually eat vegetables. FML

#19219205
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3853) - you deserved it (12742)

On 03/05/2012 at 4:42am - health - by Nope (woman) - China

Today, I called the toaster a "cheeky thing" for being done before the kettle. FML

#19137014
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6505) - you deserved it (12287)

On 02/22/2012 at 2:56am - misc - by jenni6488 - United Kingdom (Gateshead)

Today, I discovered that you can't always assume your little brother is kidding when he says that you have a spider on top of your head. FML

#19099040
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21150) - you deserved it (5023)

On 02/17/2012 at 7:43am - kids - by thatoneperson - United States (Virginia)

Today, I received a single, hand-made Valentine's card from the weirdest kid in the school. It said, "If you ever get mauled by a bear, I hope he doesn't damage your face." FML

#18988741
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24601) - you deserved it (4850)

On 02/04/2012 at 12:12am - love - by Jayde - United States (Texas)

Today, I got stuck in a revolving door. FML

#18972343
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15155) - you deserved it (6433)

On 02/01/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by pmony - United States (New York)

Today, I cut my finger with a plastic knife while demonstrating that you can't cut yourself with a plastic knife. FML

#18951415
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9402) - you deserved it (38766)

On 01/30/2012 at 10:27am - health - by cbad (woman) - United States

Today, I was sitting on a bus. I'm deaf. An old lady looked very angry at me and started talking. Then she looked like she was screaming. I had to type on my phone that I'm deaf. Apparently, I'd been stepping on her foot. She decided to poke me in the eye and type, "Now you're blind too." FML

#18936748
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33733) - you deserved it (2567)

On 01/28/2012 at 7:46pm - misc - by Come on - United States

Today, while I was peacefully sleeping, I felt a hand suddenly slap my forehead. Then fingers began to press against my mouth, then nose, then eyes. I finally woke up to my girlfriend laughing hysterically. She'd confused me with her clock-radio. FML

#18814667
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24136) - you deserved it (3118) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/15/2012 at 1:14pm - love - by Vitriol (man) - France

Today, I took my daughter to see Santa at the mall. When I went to pick her up from Santa's lap, my watch snagged on his beard, pulling it off in front of my daughter and about twenty kids in line. My daughter still isn't speaking to me. FML

#18460196
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21299) - you deserved it (3286)

On 12/08/2011 at 12:41pm - kids - by childdreamkiller (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML

#17939452
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21309) - you deserved it (4680)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:53pm - kids - by hairless - Canada (Quebec)

Today, an argument broke out between me, my girlfriend, and her sister. They were trying to convince me that not only were fairies real, but there were "scientific facts" that "prove" their existence. My girlfriend's 20 and her sister teaches primary school. FML

#17148663
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26982) - you deserved it (3883)

On 07/17/2011 at 12:01pm - misc - by Fairymyass (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I had to walk three miles home from work. Both my parents were at home. The reason they wouldn't collect me is apparently because I've "gotten so fat, your grandma cried after she saw you". FML

#14492583
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16380) - you deserved it (20126)

On 01/07/2011 at 12:46am - health - by biscuit (woman) - United Kingdom



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