Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

elguapo

Search for a member

elguapo

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3573
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

elguapo's page activity

Visits<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 12:57am<b>indeedyes08</b> - the 05/07/2009 at 10:08pm<b>Alexis774</b> - the 05/06/2009 at 12:57am<b>username666</b> - the 05/01/2009 at 5:30pm<b>wideh2ogirl</b> - the 04/28/2009 at 8:15am<b>crazy_chickxoxo</b> - the 04/28/2009 at 12:05am

elguapo's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

elguapo's favorite FMLs

Today, while babysitting, the oldest little girl who is 7 went through my purse. She pulled out a half empty bottle of lube. She asked what it was and I told her lotion. I went to the bathroom and when I came out, the bottle was empty and there were 4 kids covered in lube. Then their mom came home. FML

#142269
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40967) - you deserved it (24713)

On 02/26/2009 at 11:08am - kids - by iailwkrb (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went to get a condom because my boyfriend and I were going to have sex for the first time. When I opened the drawer, I saw that every single condom had a Jesus pin stabbed through it, and a note on top of the box: "love mom." FML

#126669
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (121776) - you deserved it (22148)

On 02/24/2009 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my hard drive on my computer crashed with all of my files on it. I took it to my Dad, who is a computer analyst, to see if he could recover anything. The only thing that he could salvage was my illustrious collection of porn. FML

#125777
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19294) - you deserved it (60771)

On 02/24/2009 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was pissing in a urinal and I had the urge to sneeze. Unable to hold it, I sneezed and hit my head on a metal beam supporting the urinal. In complete disarray, I had to step back from the urinal while pissing and managed to spray the floor, the wall, and the person next to me. FML

#125156
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56640) - you deserved it (6769)

On 02/24/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by iliketurtles (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML

#75299
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47856) - you deserved it (9730)

On 02/19/2009 at 1:14am - animals - by zac545 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
503 comments

I agree, your life sucks (228926) - you deserved it (80539)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: