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elephantsarecute

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elephantsarecute

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1750
  • Number of comments : 82
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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elephantsarecute's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss at my new job asked whether I was fitting in OK. The company is Swedish, so as a joke, I said that at home I now serve all my food as a smorgasbord, chew on fermented herring and Daim chocolate bars, and buy all my furniture at Ikea. She didn't see the funny side. FML

#19625966
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5563) - you deserved it (29410)

On 05/15/2012 at 2:48am - work - by Isa (woman) - United States

Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML

#19592298
372 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30272) - you deserved it (3072)

On 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm - misc - by wtf is wrong with my country (man) - United States

Today, my parents told me that I will grow up to be a criminal, living on the streets, on drugs. All this because I took the last chocolate egg. FML

#19443098
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27002) - you deserved it (4935)

On 04/10/2012 at 1:47pm - misc - by uhhh what? - United States (Washington)

Today, my wife sent me to the store to pick stuff up so we could make BLTs. I got the bacon, but couldn't remember what else went into them, so I bought an avocado and napkins. When I got back home, my wife very slowly and sarcastically explained what BLT stands for. FML

#19424336
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6902) - you deserved it (46953)

On 04/07/2012 at 3:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my eleven year old daughter called me a moron, after I told her she was dead wrong when she claimed that rabbits lay eggs. FML

#19376586
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22782) - you deserved it (4585)

On 03/30/2012 at 2:44pm - kids - by James (man) - United States

Today, I paid top dollar for an Italian soda that ended up consisting almost entirely of ice. When I complained, the girl insisted that the soda water stopped the ice from melting. She said she didn't see what the problem was, and threatened to have me thrown out if I didn't "simmer down." FML

#19352792
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17628) - you deserved it (4571)

On 03/26/2012 at 6:33pm - money - by Sharkie49 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I paid top dollar for an Italian soda that ended up consisting almost entirely of ice. When I complained, the girl insisted that the soda water stopped the ice from melting. She said she didn't see what the problem was, and threatened to have me thrown out if I didn't "simmer down." FML

#19352792
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17628) - you deserved it (4571)

On 03/26/2012 at 6:33pm - money - by Sharkie49 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I passed a field where some kids were playing football. The ball rolled over in my direction, so they asked me to kick it over. I tried and failed three times, and ended up throwing it over, where it embarrassingly landed about 2 feet away. They had to come over and get it. FML

#19326437
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20223) - you deserved it (9497)

On 03/22/2012 at 1:21pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - Ireland (Wexford)

Today, I had to yet again tell my mother-in-law that I wasn't going to name my unborn baby "Ermintrude" after her late mother. My husband told me to stop being difficult, and that he agrees that it would be nice. FML

#19326389
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29460) - you deserved it (2111)

On 03/22/2012 at 1:14pm - kids - by futuremum (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She said it's a good thing, because it was a "mutual decision", and that while she wouldn't mind staying together, I was the one who wanted to split, and she respected my decision. I wish I had been a part of this delusional conversation. FML

#19281871
93 comments

Today, I had to patiently listen as a customer nattered on and on about how incompetent I was for not stocking the movie she was looking for. It took nearly 20 minutes to get her to calm down long enough for me to explain that there is no such movie as "Hobbits With Shotguns". FML

#19246597
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24340) - you deserved it (2206)

On 03/09/2012 at 5:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was eating lunch at work, I practically had a panic attack because I'd forgotten to feed my Neopet. FML

#19168741
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8963) - you deserved it (32234)

On 02/26/2012 at 4:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I discovered that during fire drills, my school lines everyone up next to some extremely flammable and explosive propane tanks. If we ever have a real fire, we will all die. FML

#19164372
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28679) - you deserved it (2144)

On 02/25/2012 at 11:18pm - misc - by afraidtoburn (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I called the toaster a "cheeky thing" for being done before the kettle. FML

#19137014
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8387) - you deserved it (18956)

On 02/22/2012 at 2:56am - misc - by jenni6488 - United Kingdom (Gateshead)

Today, I went out on a first date. He insisted we go to McDonald's and split a Happy Meal because he "didn't want to waste any money on a first date." FML

#19098700
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31178) - you deserved it (4081)

On 02/17/2012 at 4:44am - love - by Cheap N Happy (woman) - United States



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