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elephantsarecute

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elephantsarecute
  • Town/Country : In your kitchen, eating your food
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 939
  • Number of comments : 80
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About elephantsarecute : ...






































































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elephantsarecute's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my daughter to buy me two pints of milk. Apparently, the shop only had four-pints, so she got that and poured half down the drain. FML

#21099986
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40856) - you deserved it (5684)

On 03/30/2014 at 6:04am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, a coworker filed a complaint against me, all because I ate a banana at lunch, which he claimed is "threateningly sexual", whatever the hell that means. FML

#21090158
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39272) - you deserved it (3233)

On 03/18/2014 at 5:31pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to bail my brother out of jail because he started a fight with a guy who didn't like owls. FML

#21082949
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41882) - you deserved it (3693)

On 03/10/2014 at 4:22am - misc - by are you kidding me? - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Today, my wife tried to report our neighbor's yard sale to the Better Business Bureau. FML

#21057520
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35148) - you deserved it (3841)

On 02/11/2014 at 8:37pm - money - by dumbwifehappylife (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my daughter started speaking with hashtags. I told her to knock it off, to which she replied, "You don't get it, mom - hashtag white girl probs." Hashtag FML

#21016204
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48242) - you deserved it (5041)

On 01/04/2014 at 1:06am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML

#20981890
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37475) - you deserved it (20724)

On 12/05/2013 at 5:26pm - misc - by possibly a sweater (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a concussion. It was when an entire shelf of bicycle helmets tumbled onto my skull. FML

#20954433
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35896) - you deserved it (2604)

On 11/11/2013 at 9:14pm - health - by myheadhurts (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my car keys are in my house and my house keys are in my car, and I'm in neither. FML

#20943997
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45810) - you deserved it (8260)

On 11/03/2013 at 3:18pm - misc - by Argh (man) - France (Poitou-Charentes)

Today, after being forced to take my little sister trick-or-treating, we had the cops called on us twice. She thought it would be funny to tell all the people giving out candy that I'd been following her around and that she had no idea who I was, and that she was scared of me. FML

Today, I had to buy a new boxcutter for work after our old one broke. It came in a box, the type which policy requires a boxcutter to open. FML

#20922948
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37150) - you deserved it (3022)

On 10/16/2013 at 5:42pm - misc - by Awahso - United States (Georgia)

Today, I dreamt that I beat someone up for using Comic Sans in a project. Now I can't look at him without being irrationally angry. FML

#20914246
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30219) - you deserved it (5679)

On 10/09/2013 at 7:15pm - work - by Ellie (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I bought a live lobster to have for dinner. When my four year old daughter discovered it in the cooler, she thanked me incessantly for finally getting her a pet. She now won't let "Mr. Shelly" out of her sight. FML

#20883807
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41971) - you deserved it (7407)

On 09/16/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by meganmagee (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my grandmother opened the bathroom door to find me eating a spoonful of Nutella while on the toilet. She is convinced that I was eating my own shit and will not stop telling everybody. They believe her. FML

#20882660
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25668) - you deserved it (37578)

On 09/15/2013 at 5:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while chatting with a friend online, I told her that Kristen Stewart isn't going to star in the 50 Shades movie as she originally thought. She then spammed me with so many "NO"/"NO WAY" messages that my crappy laptop froze up, forcing me to reboot and lose a ton of unsaved essay notes. FML

#20879898
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37463) - you deserved it (10014)

On 09/13/2013 at 5:31pm - misc - by CHEERS, TUMBLTARD (woman) -

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
507 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17103) - you deserved it (123229)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)



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