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I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, my cousin and I found out that when a girl puts a flower in the right side of her hair, it means she's available. The bigger the flower, the more available she is. My eleven year old boy cousin told me to "cut down a palm tree and put it in my hair". FML
I agree, your life sucks (56417) - you deserved it (5097)
On 06/06/2009 at 8:38pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I got a call saying that my son was chasing all the girls in the class with his "Sword of Death", otherwise known as my dildo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (75278) - you deserved it (35503)
On 05/21/2009 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by a (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, an ant bit my penis. That was the first 'mouth' to ever touch it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (80236) - you deserved it (19308)
On 04/27/2009 at 2:14am - misc - by hjgjh - United States (California)
Today, I parked downtown for a few minutes to pick up a pizza. As I was getting out of my car, a sketchy guy came up and asked me for $5. I told him to get lost and walked away. I walked back to the lot with my pizza and my car was gone. The sketchy guy was a parking attendent. He had my car towed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9402) - you deserved it (49023)
On 04/23/2009 at 9:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was emailing my professor about what chapters our test is on this afternoon. She accidentally emailed me informing me of the date she went on last night, including that she "got laid... yay!!" and a picture. I still don't know what chapters I'm being tested on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (90583) - you deserved it (5320)
On 04/20/2009 at 1:12pm - intimacy - by TMI (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I had to re-take an hour long MRI scan because I got an erection midway through. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59500) - you deserved it (12223)
On 04/17/2009 at 10:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I told my ex boyfriend I lost 20 lbs because of the stress of the break up. His response was "you're welcome." FML
I agree, your life sucks (43437) - you deserved it (19548)
On 04/09/2009 at 6:11pm - misc - by blutownie13 - United States
Today, my good friend who just had a baby girl sent her newborn's pictures to me via picture message. To reply, instead of writing "Awwwwww" I wrote "Ewwwwww" by mistake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21173) - you deserved it (48373)
On 04/08/2009 at 4:42pm - kids - by nothing (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was at work laminating a large photo. While I was doing this, I had a sudden itch on my nut sack. So I quickly scratched it away. When the customer came to pick up the print, I noticed that one of my pubic hairs had laminated itself on the cheek of the woman in the photograph. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12886) - you deserved it (70754)
On 04/08/2009 at 10:48am - work - by StevieMe (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was volunteering at a school. There's this really bratty boy there and he was being rude, so I joked, "How are you ever gonna get a girlfriend when you're so mean?" He responds, "I think the better question is how are you ever gonna get a boyfriend when you're so ugly." He's 7. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59852) - you deserved it (15459)
On 04/07/2009 at 7:34pm - kids - by ugly (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was delivering packages to patients in the hospital for my job. My boss gave me a room to deliver to, and I drop it off as usual. But my boss gave me the wrong room number. I had to walk in, apologize, and take back balloons and a stuffed animal from a crying 6year old patient. FML
I agree, your life sucks (96955) - you deserved it (4811)
On 04/05/2009 at 4:17pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I set my AIM status to be the currently-playing file on my iTunes. I've downloaded a lot of porn to my iTunes, and I wanted to watch some. My status changed to "Girl in Latex gets fucked in the ass." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13650) - you deserved it (109131)
On 04/04/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by ohshittttttt - United States (New York)
Today, I was called by my 9 year old son's teacher. He had handcuffed himself to his desk with handcuffs he found in my room. I was told to please bring in the key and not to leave my kinky toys out where a child could get them. I'm a cop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (82568) - you deserved it (7029)
On 03/31/2009 at 4:47pm - kids - by poo_shoe123 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was masturbating in my room when my dog started to bark obnoxiously. He does this all the time so I ignored it and kept going. This went on for about a half hour. When I went downstairs, I found an open door and an empty TV stand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15610) - you deserved it (68658)
On 03/29/2009 at 10:08pm - animals - by trainE - United States (Michigan)
Today, me and my girlfriend went to the club. The song "Single Ladies" by Beyonce came on; the DJ came on the mic and said "Single ladies raise your hands!" My girlfriend raised her hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53124) - you deserved it (5231)
On 03/27/2009 at 11:40pm - love - by dumpedattheclub (man) - United States (Texas)
Friday 24 May 2013
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