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eksyneet's favorite FMLs
by Anon / 05/24/2015 at 9:14pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/28/2014 at 9:49pm / United States (Delaware) / Intimacy
by lexigan4 / 10/29/2014 at 3:39pm / United Kingdom / Kids
Today, I stood up too quickly and got dizzy, so I sat on the edge of the bed to regain my balance. I started dozing off to sleep again, got confused, and peed down the side of my bed thinking I was on the toilet. FML
by Waterfalls / 10/07/2014 at 7:33am / United States (California) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/05/2014 at 11:47am / United States (Virginia) / Love
Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML
by cunning glassist / 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
Today, my boyfriend started whispering "blowjobbbb" into my ear while we were watching a movie. When I asked him what he was doing, he denied ever saying it and claimed it must have been a subliminal message in the movie. FML
by Subliminal message / 01/19/2014 at 6:21pm / Switzerland / Intimacy
by fuckadaisical / 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm / United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff) / Intimacy
by zzfreakshow / 10/14/2013 at 8:16pm / United States (California) / Animals
by kelbel89 / 10/01/2013 at 5:46pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML
by Anonymous / 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Intimacy
by ugh Buck! / 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm / United States / Animals
Today, at a job interview, I was asked what I thought of twerking. It was a bizarre question, but trying to get on the interviewer's good side, I said I thought it was pretty cool. He snorted and said I'll be job-seeking for a while yet. FML
by howprofessional / 09/06/2013 at 5:23pm / United States (Michigan) / Work
by cassidy_smith12 / 08/24/2013 at 10:55am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/05/2013 at 2:11am / United States (Iowa) / Money
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…