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eksyneet

Offline (the 08/24/2015 at 7:59pm) | Search for a member

eksyneet

12Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1156
  • Number of comments : 92
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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eksyneet's page activity

Visits<b>Supaviper</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 12:47pm<b>thetacosniper</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 7:39am<b>jsb1426</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 7:08am<b>ironik69</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 3:41am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 12:11pm<b>Duhitstori</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 12:55am<b>wantmeasandwich</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 1:12pm<b>buckstop1</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 7:18pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 11:25pm<b>jasonm27</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 6:50am<b>wil1029</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 3:00am<b>kianabanannna</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 9:57am<b>munuxi</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 4:34am<b>psackett</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 2:37pm<b>hollenbackam</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 9:09am<b>suprisebitch</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 6:48pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 2:49pm<b>dettesuger</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 1:08am

Fucked!<b>ironik69</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 9:41am<b>TheDarkAce13000</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 10:59pm<b>Futebol_Queen11</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 4:41pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 12:39pm<b>aperron96</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 7:22pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 6:57pm<b>aliceablaze</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 7:17pm<b>Kailayla</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 8:44am<b>clairesucks</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 3:03am<b>turdoblast</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 4:04am<b>kittyfrozen</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 9:13pm<b>DreadedSamurai</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 5:25am

eksyneet's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

See all of eksyneet's badges

eksyneet's favorite FMLs

Today, I got so used to using this FML app while going to the bathroom that when I opened it, I accidentally peed a little. FML

#21415171
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27644) - you deserved it (11466)

On 05/24/2015 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Things got heated and I yelled, "Who's your daddy?" With a blank expression she replied, "I don't know." FML

#21326143
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34417) - you deserved it (17062)

On 12/28/2014 at 9:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I walked in on my little brother making a Devil's trap so he could capture the demon he thinks is possessing my hamster. FML

#21287735
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34564) - you deserved it (3615)

On 10/29/2014 at 3:39pm - kids - by lexigan4 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I stood up too quickly and got dizzy, so I sat on the edge of the bed to regain my balance. I started dozing off to sleep again, got confused, and peed down the side of my bed thinking I was on the toilet. FML

#21272641
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37741) - you deserved it (10147)

On 10/07/2014 at 7:33am - misc - by Waterfalls (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

#21271177
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46250) - you deserved it (6046)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML

#21081466
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51568) - you deserved it (10392)

On 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm - love - by cunning glassist (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend started whispering "blowjobbbb" into my ear while we were watching a movie. When I asked him what he was doing, he denied ever saying it and claimed it must have been a subliminal message in the movie. FML

#21033101
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53866) - you deserved it (8265)

On 01/19/2014 at 6:21pm - intimacy - by Subliminal message (woman) - Switzerland

Today, my boyfriend's idea of foreplay was to offer to make lunch, leave the room for a few minutes, then come back with no clothes on and offer me a "cockmeat sandwich". FML

#20982904
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53334) - you deserved it (8642)

On 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm - intimacy - by fuckadaisical (woman) - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, I fell asleep while at the beach with friends. Someone thought it would be funny to put chunks of bread on and around my junk. Seagulls have sharp beaks. FML

#20920631
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43090) - you deserved it (4845)

On 10/14/2013 at 8:16pm - misc - by zzfreakshow (man) - United States (California)

Today, at the age of 23, I brought my boyfriend over to meet my parents. My father swabbed his mouth for DNA and fingerprinted him. FML

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59768) - you deserved it (29692)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

#20876988
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53322) - you deserved it (4283)

On 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm - animals - by ugh Buck! (woman) - United States

Today, at a job interview, I was asked what I thought of twerking. It was a bizarre question, but trying to get on the interviewer's good side, I said I thought it was pretty cool. He snorted and said I'll be job-seeking for a while yet. FML

#20870423
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23001) - you deserved it (45599)

On 09/06/2013 at 5:23pm - work - by howprofessional (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was walking down the street when a man stole my purse. He then opened the purse, threw up in it, and gave it back. FML

#20852114
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47675) - you deserved it (3431)

On 08/24/2013 at 10:55am - misc - by cassidy_smith12 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that my parents spent all of the money in my college fund to pay for my cat to be flown to LA and audition for a movie. FML

#20764588
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67502) - you deserved it (3961)

On 07/05/2013 at 2:11am - money - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)



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