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ekim300

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ekim300
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  • Number of visits : 432
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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ekim300's favorite FMLs

Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML

#19215354
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27177) - you deserved it (3629)

On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I started crying in class because of a sad part in the book I was reading. I got pulled out into the hallway and my male teacher asked, "Is it your special time?" FML

#19189371
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26147) - you deserved it (5967)

On 02/29/2012 at 3:21pm - misc - by Crying - United States (Michigan)

Today, I visited the doctor. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML

#19063795
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31342) - you deserved it (2173)

On 02/13/2012 at 7:03am - health - by loveinanelevator (man) -

Today, the vibrator I ordered online was delivered. I'd paid extra to make sure it would be here before the weekend, so I could sneak it into my room while everyone was gone. My dad decided to stay home all day and answer the door ahead of me. FML

#18864460
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24256) - you deserved it (7694)

On 01/20/2012 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by Ouch (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I sold my Xbox and Kinect to a guy. I forgot that sometimes I'd play Dance Central naked, and the Kinect would make videos. This guy now has videos of me, naked, badly dancing. FML

#18791715
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10232) - you deserved it (35013)

On 01/13/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML

#18626435
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35658) - you deserved it (6345)

On 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm - intimacy - by blegh (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my coworker friend told me she was going to the restroom. Soon after, I did the same. Once in the stall, I could smell a stench emanating from the next one. I yelled, "Ew, you stinky bitch" and sprayed air freshener under the partition. As I left the stall, my friend walked into the restroom. FML

#18490582
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8439) - you deserved it (39185)

On 12/11/2011 at 11:46pm - work - by stinky (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I played Taboo with my boyfriend and my conservative family. It was my boyfriend's turn and his word was "cherry". His only clue to me was, "I popped your..." He was the only one who found it funny. FML

#18424133
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33134) - you deserved it (4631)

On 12/04/2011 at 12:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I failed my driving test before even leaving the DMV parking lot. FML

#18275233
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11106) - you deserved it (25015)

On 11/17/2011 at 7:19pm - misc - by that guy -

Today, I failed my driving test before even leaving the DMV parking lot. FML

#18275233
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11106) - you deserved it (25015)

On 11/17/2011 at 7:19pm - misc - by that guy -

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33867) - you deserved it (18244)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, I finished a very important but annoying presentation that took four hours to complete. Only after writing a paragraph to explain the presentation and sending it to my boss did I realize that I saved the document as "Shit I have to do to get a promotion." FML

#18231005
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9927) - you deserved it (37087)

On 11/12/2011 at 7:36pm - work - by TTR (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I dined and dashed. Upon reaching my car, I realized I had left my seven year-old daughter in the restaurant. FML

#18217676
372 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7033) - you deserved it (98287)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:17am - kids - by embarrassed - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML

#18014569
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39274) - you deserved it (8141)

On 10/18/2011 at 11:01am - intimacy - by imy - United States (Texas)

Today, while reading over my sent application email to a job I have been trying to get, I found out my brother had put "Heil Hitler!" as my signature. FML

#17996037
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33108) - you deserved it (4700)

On 10/16/2011 at 3:15am - work - by Unemployed - United States (Oregon)



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