ekim300

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Offline (the 06/26/2016 at 11:58am)

ekim300

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 19 December 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3162
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ekim300 : The name is Mike. Feel free to say hello. Friendly people are always welcome.

ekim300's page activity

Visits<b>Mons</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 7:24am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 3:54pm<b>silvermoon5033</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 5:35am<b>mikuxxhatsune</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 4:16am<b>Lustig_Junge</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 4:09pm<b>UmbraSlayer</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 3:46pm<b>MiLM</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 1:24pm<b>shaar</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 12:23am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 10:36pm<b>its_lance</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 2:51am<b>iTzYourDad</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 2:46pm<b>CVTTRVN</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 3:39am<b>1PersonIsMyWorld</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 11:51pm<b>Saraj07</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 3:46pm<b>demonddm</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 2:52pm<b>vlalam</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 12:45pm<b>noor723</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 12:17pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 10:49pm

Fucked!<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 5:20pm<b>demonddm</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 7:52pm<b>noor723</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 5:17pm<b>biaferoli</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 9:51pm<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 3:46am

ekim300's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Socialite

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of ekim300's badges

ekim300's favorite FMLs

Today, I found my 6-year-old daughter recording herself on her little tape recorder. When I asked her what she was up to, she replied in her cute little voice, "I'm recording myself so you'll have a souvenir when I'm dead." FML

by DarkChild / 02/11/2016 at 5:18pm / France / Kids

Today, I was sitting at my desk in school, and I was really bored. I started playing with the strings on my pants, only to realize 5 minutes later it looked like I was fondling my dick. FML

by xsnqw / 01/19/2016 at 5:28pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, at college, I walked in on some kid jerking off in front of the bathroom sink. This place never ceases to amaze and disgust me. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2015 at 10:55pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that the "toothpaste" that I'm always cleaning out with my hands from the sink drain is actually my little brother's semen. FML

by cole66 / 11/29/2015 at 1:43pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I were sending dirty messages to each other. We were getting really into it until she replied to one of my messages with, "Oooooh yeah." I read it in the Kool-Aid man's voice and couldn't stop laughing. Mood killed. FML

by Stuby14 / 11/23/2015 at 9:31am / United States (South Dakota) / Intimacy

Today, I was house-sitting for my friend. He was late to return and I ended up falling asleep on the couch and having a dream where I violently shat myself and suddenly developed a six-pack. When I woke up, I found the dream was half true. FML

by Anonymous / 11/21/2015 at 5:03am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my father, who is not familiar with keyboards, had me register his new email account for him at the public library. His username choice? "Wang dang sweet poon tang". People heard. FML

by cassieleigh1 / 11/05/2015 at 12:05am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while on a walk during lunch, I urgently needed to pee. Not thinking I could make it back to the office, I slipped into some bushes to relieve myself. As I was going, I looked to the side and saw two coworkers staring back at me. They were having sex, and I'm there with my dick out. Awkward. FML

by Embarrassed ass. / 10/23/2015 at 12:05am / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I was savagely beating my wife on Call of Duty, since she demanded that I play normally and not hold back. 15 minutes later, she was raging at me, calling me a bastard and saying she wished we'd never married. FML

by JJ / 10/03/2015 at 3:42am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I took my dad out shopping. I managed to pull into a really cramped parking spot and said, "Man, that was a tight squeeze." My dad then looked me in the eyes and said, "So was your mom." FML

by Nick Pat / 09/30/2015 at 9:13am / Miscellaneous

Today, at 8:00am, I walked into the kitchen and stubbed my toe. That's quite a normal occurrence, but this time, I stubbed it on my drunk, passed out, 53-year-old father's forehead. He's mad at me now and has cancelled my allowance. I'm 23. FML

by Anon / 09/28/2015 at 11:18pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, there was a big party at my workplace. The only person that was socializing with me in any way was my co-workers 4-year-old daughter. Before leaving, she drew smiley faces on plastic plates and napkins and gave them to me so I "will have some friends and not be all alone". FML

by ForeverAlone / 09/22/2015 at 5:40pm / Ukraine / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to a cat licking my face. I don't have a cat. I quickly put the cat out the front door and went back to sleep. When I woke up later, I remembered that I had agreed to take care of my sister's cat for a week. I looked out the door, but the cat is nowhere to be found. FML

by introublenow / 09/18/2015 at 8:22am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I responded to an argument with my girlfriend by only using comebacks she'd used in previous arguments. I'm single now. FML

by Cygnus / 08/03/2015 at 10:14am / United States (Iowa) / Love

Today, I finally finished downloading a 60GB TV series after two weeks of waiting. Every single "episode" turned out to be Rick Astley singing Never Gonna Give You Up, on constant repeat. I almost respect the prankster's effort enough to not want to gut him like a fish. Almost. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2015 at 8:52pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous