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eggfactory

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 21 June 1984 (32 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1438
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About eggfactory : Well that's unfortunate, you were probably looking for a hot young lady and here you are. Except i'm past 28 and a giant nerd. I also like puns, and crumbs, motherfucking crumbs. Aw Yissss.

eggfactory's page activity

Visits<b>Captobvious19</b> - the 10/15/2016 at 3:36pm<b>ChuckHolmes</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 9:48am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 11:38am<b>chewsef</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 10:10am<b>armedenglish96</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 6:13pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 2:12am<b>Liam115</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 11:12pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 1:03am<b>hguthery14</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 11:34pm<b>goalie01</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 5:39am<b>Hetalia_freak</b> - the 09/27/2012 at 4:51am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 06/28/2012 at 11:14am<b>bluecheesehash</b> - the 03/28/2012 at 10:34pm<b>rcbarnes</b> - the 03/02/2012 at 7:32am<b>swiwi</b> - the 02/12/2012 at 5:54pm

Fucked!<b>tin_cup</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 5:38pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 8:12am

eggfactory's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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eggfactory's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2012 at 10:26am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a picture of a dude on a Harley on my friend's wall. I asked her if it was Dog the bounty hunter. It wasn't, it was her aunt. FML

by GogoTheGreat / 04/23/2012 at 10:12pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

by Miss_Kristen / 02/26/2012 at 10:31am / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, my boyfriend referred to his penis as 'The Eye of Sauron'. It didn't help when he pulled down his foreskin, pointed it in my direction and said 'I see you'. FML

by anon / 01/18/2012 at 1:29pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I accidentally moaned my own name during sex. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2012 at 1:43am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my dog started limping as we were walking home. I thought she'd hurt herself, so I picked her up and carried her home. Once we arrived, I put her down, at which point she ran around and played as if nothing had happened. I fell for my lazy dog's plan to get me to carry her home. FML

by vanessa560 / 01/03/2012 at 2:44pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I went to my doctor. I casually asked him why I keep getting headaches after I masturbate. He said it probably was a sign from God. FML

by toomuch / 11/22/2011 at 4:36am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, at the nail salon, a Korean woman was making fun of me. I kindly told her, in Korean, that I understood. She kindly told me, in English, that she didn't care. FML

by EunJung / 11/03/2011 at 8:16pm / United States / Work

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend, and started to climb on top of him sexily. He blurted out, "Oh my god, you're like that girl from The Ring." FML

by Anonymous / 09/21/2011 at 9:17am / United States / Love

Today, at work, I was walking to the back office, and I didn't know my manager was following me. After I walked through the door, without looking, I reached behind me to close it. Instead of grabbing the door handle, I got a handful of his crotch. FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2011 at 12:46am / United States (Tennessee) / Work

Today, I went to the House of Horrors at Universal Studios. People dressed up as monsters would jump at us, and I was so freaked out that I tripped. My equally terrified mom fell on top of me. Frankenstein's monster was nice enough to ask us if we were alright. FML

by Trimacle / 08/24/2011 at 2:32am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while babysitting a five year old, I found a cartoon called Metalocalypse for him to watch while I made dinner. I didn't realize it was an "adult" cartoon until afterwards. He watched a whole episode about a clown with a cocaine problem. FML

by dummy / 07/11/2011 at 3:21pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids

Today, as I was walking back inside I noticed my mop leaning on the wall next to my door. I picked it up and started slow dancing with it, imagining it was the girl I'm in love with. I didn't notice my neighbours bunched up at their window laughing. FML

by anonymous / 05/04/2011 at 6:01am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was chosen to MC a function at work. I developed a terrible case of hiccups which made the audience giggle and groan for the duration of my time on stage. FML

by Anonymous / 03/24/2011 at 3:29am / Australia / Work

Today, while watching Animal Planet, I realised my boyfriend uses the Dog Whisperer techniques on me. FML

by notagoodsign / 02/28/2011 at 5:55am / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Love