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eggfactory

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eggfactory

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 21 June 1984 (30 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 736
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About eggfactory : Well that's unfortunate, you were probably looking for a hot young lady and here you are. Except i'm past 28 and a giant nerd. I also like puns, and crumbs, motherfucking crumbs. Aw Yissss.

eggfactory's page activity

Visits<b>PresAgent</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 1:03am<b>hguthery14</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 11:34pm<b>goalie01</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 5:39am<b>Hetalia_freak</b> - the 09/27/2012 at 4:51am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 06/28/2012 at 11:14am<b>bluecheesehash</b> - the 03/28/2012 at 10:34pm<b>rcbarnes</b> - the 03/02/2012 at 7:32am<b>swiwi</b> - the 02/12/2012 at 5:54pm

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eggfactory's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog was knocked unconscious. I had to race him to the vet and pay a small fortune for x-rays and shots. All because he ran into the kitchen at full speed and smashed headfirst into the refrigerator after hearing me open a bag of turkey. FML

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

#21389976
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17307) - you deserved it (32333)

On 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm - misc - by S to the HIT (man) - United States (California)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend because I felt unappreciated. She found it appropriate to sarcastically say, "Oh no, how will I ever be able to open my jars?" FML

#21378617
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29974) - you deserved it (50)

On 03/20/2015 at 9:32pm - love - by tumbleshay - United States (Oregon)

Today, I hit my head on the steering wheel when I sneezed. I managed to honk the horn and the guy next to me couldn't stop laughing. FML

#21361311
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32363) - you deserved it (4783)

On 02/22/2015 at 8:41pm - misc - by headache - United States

Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML

#21024543
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45963) - you deserved it (4944)

On 01/11/2014 at 1:52pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, I invited my boyfriend over to meet my new puppy. My dog decided to take a dump on his lap. He is now not talking to me because he thinks I trained my dog to do that. FML

#20934961
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38778) - you deserved it (4138)

On 10/26/2013 at 9:23pm - animals - by Puppy problems - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

#20876988
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49683) - you deserved it (3962)

On 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm - animals - by ugh Buck! (woman) - United States

Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML

#20798640
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56416) - you deserved it (12031)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:04am - intimacy - by suckstosuck (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

#20582197
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47573) - you deserved it (4899)

On 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had an in-depth conversation at work about how technically Luke Skywalker was never a Jedi Master. Highlight of my working day. FML

#20497564
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21027) - you deserved it (5260)

On 02/07/2013 at 9:56pm - work - by djxerxes9000 - Canada

Today, I found my dogs freezing outside. My neighbor was supposed to watch them while I was away, and on my way home I called to let her know she should let them have a quick walk. She thought I'd be home soon enough that she wouldn't have to let them back in. It was minus 10c out. FML

#20436199
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36069) - you deserved it (3940)

On 01/01/2013 at 12:35pm - animals - by Enyo - Reserved

Today, my teacher assigned us teams in a class debate. I landed on the team that had to argue the obviously wrong point of view. When I finished, my teacher told me and the entire class how much I disturbed her, and how I reminded her of Hitler and Napoleon. FML

#20058797
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26382) - you deserved it (2243)

On 09/05/2012 at 12:25pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML

#20011233
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20399) - you deserved it (3473)

On 08/09/2012 at 10:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17280) - you deserved it (29665)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend referred to his penis as 'The Eye of Sauron'. It didn't help when he pulled down his foreskin, pointed it in my direction and said 'I see you'. FML

#18844188
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32032) - you deserved it (5002)

On 01/18/2012 at 1:29pm - intimacy - by anon - United Kingdom



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