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e077

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e077
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 17 March 1991 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 3804
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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e077's favorite FMLs

Today, after my credit card was stolen, the thief made donations to charitable associations. Now I feel bad for asking for the money back. FML

#18973351
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32019) - you deserved it (3100)

On 02/01/2012 at 11:35pm - money - by zobara - Switzerland

Today, my son learned that when you slide a mug across the kitchen table, it doesn't stop where you expect it to like in the old cartoons. I then learned what it feels like to have a full mug of hot chocolate spilled onto my crotch. FML

#18972583
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20690) - you deserved it (2710)

On 02/01/2012 at 10:11pm - kids - by Bruce (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I got stuck in a revolving door. FML

#18972343
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15154) - you deserved it (6433)

On 02/01/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by pmony - United States (New York)

Today, my morning sickness has been so bad that my husband's farts send me running to the bathroom. He thinks it's hilarious, and has been following me around all day trying to crack one off in my face. FML

#18969254
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28839) - you deserved it (3343)

On 02/01/2012 at 3:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my son sprayed our white couch with Febreze. This would have been great, were the "Febreze" not actually black spray paint. FML

#18969036
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23621) - you deserved it (3345)

On 02/01/2012 at 2:35pm - kids - by Anonymous -

Today, I flew to England to visit my boyfriend, who has been working there for the past three months. I went to his hotel and waited for him; he never showed up. I called one of his colleagues to ask him what was going on. He had no idea what I was talking about. FML

#18968998
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27971) - you deserved it (2425)

On 02/01/2012 at 2:31pm - love - by mareda (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, it was our class field trip. I got five dollars from ten different people because they wanted me to sit away from them. FML

#18968842
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24801) - you deserved it (4187)

On 02/01/2012 at 1:53pm - misc - by Arniii - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML

#18968605
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28822) - you deserved it (3072)

On 02/01/2012 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by manhandled - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML

#18967800
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50867) - you deserved it (3881)

On 02/01/2012 at 10:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while helping my mom to cook, I was reminded that when the fire alarm goes off in our house, dinner is ready. FML

#18967284
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17335) - you deserved it (2154)

On 02/01/2012 at 7:21am - misc - by JohhnyKeroscene - United States

Today, my nap was cut short by three bricks flying through my window. FML

#18966714
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23284) - you deserved it (1848)

On 02/01/2012 at 3:22am - misc - by dammit - United States

Today, it was my first time having sex with this guy. After a few second he stops, sits in the corner of his room buff-naked, with his knees up and his hands on his face. He then pouts and claims it was his worst performance ever. FML

#18966700
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26807) - you deserved it (3384)

On 02/01/2012 at 3:19am - intimacy - by crybaby - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I had to sit my 13-year-old son down and explain to him that I'd noticed that his pajamas feel a little "crispy" when I pick them up to do the laundry, and ask if he could start using tissues when having some "alone time." FML

#18966482
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27491) - you deserved it (5031)

On 02/01/2012 at 2:11am - intimacy - by stainseverywhere (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML

#18966203
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21687) - you deserved it (4837)

On 02/01/2012 at 1:13am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I found out how it feels when a refrigerator door unhinges and falls on your toes. FML

#18965724
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25370) - you deserved it (1930)

On 02/01/2012 at 12:06am - health - by kb - United States (Texas)



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