[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

dusty1030

Search for a member

dusty1030
  • Town/Country : Soon to be, Hawaii
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 10 July 1989 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 3292
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About dusty1030 : woah

dusty1030's last visitors

SlaughterhimUr_REmEdylovingredHaleyRAWRa7xtimtam24Treewhispermslaydjae

dusty1030's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

dusty1030's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my girlfriend's very religious parents for dinner. Somehow we got to talking about her groin hernias that were repaired as a baby. I never knew she had hernias repaired and said, "But she doesn't have any scars down there." There was a long awkward silence. FML

#618069 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (25806) - you deserved it (92933)

On 03/26/2009 at 3:37am - intimacy - by douchetard (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was shaving off my beard for the first time in a very long time. I decided to have a little fun with it, and shaved my beard first into a goatee, then a handle-bar, then, finally, into a Hitler mustache. My electric razor dies. I don't have a normal one or an extra battery. FML

#597085 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (29095) - you deserved it (63587)

On 03/25/2009 at 10:13am - misc - by nomorebeard (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938 (1736)

I agree, your life sucks (363052) - you deserved it (401406)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was driving down the road when I got to a red light. I looked over and saw a hot chick in a convertible so I spoke to my window thinking she couldn't hear me "Hey girl, I may have a tiny dick but I make up for it in speed and stamina." She looked over. I forgot about the sunroof. FML

#239452 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (5616) - you deserved it (62520)

On 03/08/2009 at 12:36am - intimacy - by Smash_Mouth - United States (Florida)

Today, my teacher confiscated my cell phone for text messaging. He said he would give it back if the next text that I would receive was important. I prayed the guy I've been texting didn't send the dick pic he said he was going to. He did. FML

#160435 (196)

I agree, your life sucks (21806) - you deserved it (75862)

On 02/28/2009 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by textfail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend. When she asked me to pick up her thong from behind my bed I realized there were two. I didn't pick up hers. FML

#18252 (124)

I agree, your life sucks (8475) - you deserved it (99262)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:41pm - misc - by Dulieu (man) - United States (Rhode Island)