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dunicha's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
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dunicha's favorite FMLs
by SnapeIsGood / 11/08/2016 at 4:44am / Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg) / Health
by knifewow / 10/20/2016 at 4:30am / Australia (Queensland) / Work
by Randomspaghetti / 09/15/2016 at 5:11pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
by harambae / 09/11/2016 at 1:10pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
Today, my dog brought me his squeaky toy to throw for him. I went to throw it down the hallway but it hit the door and bounced about a foot in front of him. He just stared at me for a minute like I was dumb, then took it to my boyfriend to throw. I disappoint even my dog. FML
by nattnatt73 / 09/10/2016 at 3:07am / United States (North Carolina) / Animals
by crazycatlady / 08/24/2016 at 5:43am / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals
Today, I saw my new pet fish completely missing the food at the bottom of his tank and sucking up the little rocks instead. My last dog died from eating rocks. I think I'm doomed to have insanely stupid pets. FML
by StupidPets / 08/23/2016 at 11:09pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals
Today, my religious dad caught my brother jerking off and decided to give us both a lecture about it. My brother ended up saying "If god doesn't want me to jerk off, how come he made my knob the perfect shape to fit in my hand?" I burst out laughing and now we're both grounded. FML
by LostInSunday / 08/15/2016 at 4:11am / Miscellaneous
Today, I learned that the hardest part of marrying a historian is choosing baby names. His top choices derive from two Roman magistrates, two abbesses, a tenth-century author, and an obscure Greek official. I already let him name our pug, for whom he chose the name "Tertullianus." FML
by NeitherHrotsvitNorErkembaldus / 07/29/2016 at 5:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/08/2016 at 9:13pm / Transportation
by Anonymous / 05/20/2016 at 12:59pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I saw a man help an elderly lady with her tray at the local McDonald's. I wanted to do something nice for him, so I added a couple extra nuggets in his meal. He later came up to me and told me I was dumb and didn't know how to count, and that was why I was working at McDonald's. FML
by korbo7 / 05/16/2016 at 11:26pm / United States (Nebraska) / Work