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drbolton

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drbolton

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  • Number of visits : 667
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 11:30pm<b>VeganDarkLight</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 3:03pm

Fucked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 9:14pm

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drbolton's favorite FMLs

Today, I took a shower with my boyfriend. I tried to be adventurous and went to give him a blowjob, only to end up slipping and head-butting him in the balls. FML

#21406233
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31638) - you deserved it (5293)

On 05/07/2015 at 2:00pm - intimacy - by pleasedie - United States (Florida)

Today, a guy asked me for my number. Now I deeply regret giving it to him, because he won't stop sending me Bible quotes and pictures of Jesus. FML

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend for the first time. I moved my leg to wrap it around him and accidentally hit his penis. Without thinking, I said, "Sorry little guy!" FML

#21402047
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31247) - you deserved it (9725)

On 04/29/2015 at 10:25pm - intimacy - by MiniJeans - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom announced my pregnancy to the entire family via Facebook with the post, "Just went from a MILF to a GILF in one moment of unprotected sex." FML

#21401833
100 comments

Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be romantic to take me to a strip club for our 1-year anniversary. FML

#21382971
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28322) - you deserved it (3483)

On 03/28/2015 at 1:10pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I took the biggest, most excruciatingly painful crap of my life. It was so bad that I couldn't walk straight for a good 20 minutes afterwards. Long enough for my boyfriend to film me limping around and post the clip to Facebook with the caption "#anal ftw ;)". FML

#21379420
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29947) - you deserved it (3540)

On 03/22/2015 at 10:59am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I have spent so much time watching Scooby Doo with my son that I actually used the word "zoinks". FML

#21352876
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26527) - you deserved it (5299)

On 02/09/2015 at 6:07pm - kids - by brazo667 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, hours after being turned down for sex, I woke up to my boyfriend sitting at the computer, jacking off to a picture of my deceased mom. FML

#21351381
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49510) - you deserved it (4195)

On 02/07/2015 at 6:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I can't decide what's worse: the fact that my mother found my vibrator or that, as a prank, she replaced it with a realistic tarantula replica. She won't tell me where it is. FML

#21351119
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26733) - you deserved it (4203)

On 02/06/2015 at 7:57pm - misc - by go fuck myself - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband came home, drunk and with lipstick smeared on his face. When I confronted him about it, he just slurred, "Ah don't worry babe, it ain't mine." FML

#21343515
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33392) - you deserved it (2646)

On 01/24/2015 at 3:26pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I was diagnosed with gonorrhea. My dad's reaction was to slowly clap at the news then giggle at his own joke. FML

#21342311
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27910) - you deserved it (9476)

On 01/22/2015 at 3:23pm - health - by annoyed (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to gather the laundry out of the dryer. My daughter had seen my wife put bleach in the washer, so she decided that honey in the dryer would make the clothes smell sweet. She wasn't wrong, but now I have a giant ball of sticky socks and underwear. FML

#21331413
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25655) - you deserved it (2223)

On 01/05/2015 at 4:26pm - kids - by Synonymous_Rex - United States (California)

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, we were cuddling when he grabbed his penis and made it say, "That was amazing! Thank you for the sex." He's 21 years old. FML

#21330918
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27844) - you deserved it (6119)

On 01/04/2015 at 9:50pm - love - by myboyfriendisweird - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend finally played the new guitar I bought to replace the one he broke. He used a $1000 guitar to play me a moving song about my butt. FML

#21328639
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24072) - you deserved it (4676)

On 01/01/2015 at 1:16pm - love - by ButtWorthSingingBout (woman) - United States (Arizona)



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