About dontpanic : I can get stuck in the 90's occasionally. I have a slightly problematic addiction to macaroni and cheese...I can't go a day without some sort of tomato product. I like the color pink. A lot
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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, my loyalty and regularity at my local pizza place were noticed. The delivery guy, when bringing yet another order, asked me if the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were living with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21499) - you deserved it (7534) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/31/2013 at 7:26am - misc - by heallven - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was cleaning at work when an elderly gentleman walked towards me, paused, and with a wink said, "That's what I like to see: a girl on her knees." This is the same workplace where another old man informed me that my yellow uniform made me look like a "suggestive cheesecake." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25117) - you deserved it (1737)
On 01/22/2013 at 6:14am - work - by Job Seeking (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I finally got to conduct my first questioning of a suspect, who had been arrested in connection with a car theft. As I recited the Miranda warning to him, my mind went totally blank, and after a few seconds, he sarcastically continued the speech for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24663) - you deserved it (10450)
On 01/17/2013 at 12:15pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me, and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15865) - you deserved it (1777)
On 12/07/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, as I was waiting for my girlfriend in the street, I saw a woman who looked a lot like her. I ran towards her, my arms in the air ready to give her a hug, only to realise it wasn't her. I then had to pass the woman, my arms in the air, still running. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21837) - you deserved it (4939) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 09/21/2012 at 7:31am - misc - by minibuch1505 - Sent from mobile version
Today, I made my friends and family laugh by trying to put on costume glasses with a giant super-sized nose attached to them. They laughed hysterically. Not because of the gigantic nose, but because my real nose was radically bigger and the fake one wouldn't fit over it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17852) - you deserved it (2524)
On 05/11/2012 at 9:24am - misc - by MobPerfect (man) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6308) - you deserved it (20438)
On 01/28/2012 at 6:31pm - misc - by GothicbunnyxC (woman) - Canada (Prince Edward Island)
Today, my therapist told me to write down my secrets in an envelope and symbolically burn them. My secrets included stories of my rampant sex life, drug use, a suicide attempt, and the overpowering hatred I have for my family. I've managed to misplace the envelope somewhere back home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22451) - you deserved it (17861)
On 02/23/2011 at 4:07pm - misc - by Elle (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my therapist told me to write down my secrets in an envelope and symbolically burn them. My secrets included stories of my rampant sex life, drug use, a suicide attempt, and the overpowering hatred I have for my family. I've managed to misplace the envelope somewhere back home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22451) - you deserved it (17861)
On 02/23/2011 at 4:07pm - misc - by Elle (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was sitting in a parked car. A woman was having difficulties maneuvering out. She honked the horn repeatedly for me to move, then looked me in the eye and called me a "f**king bitch", before driving off. I was in the passenger seat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22683) - you deserved it (2080)
On 12/08/2010 at 10:24am - misc - by agstadra (woman) - Canada
Today, my boss walked down to my office with me to get some paperwork after a very tense, important meeting. He patiently waited while I tried to unlock my office door with my remote for my car. Twice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5826) - you deserved it (17657)
On 09/15/2010 at 11:01am - work - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version
Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42857) - you deserved it (6382)
On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was vacuuming our house because I wanted to help my parents. I wore a headset while listening to REALLY loud music. The vacuuming job took me two hours and when I took of my headset I noticed that I hadn't started the vacuum cleaner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6986) - you deserved it (44567)
On 01/18/2010 at 6:01am - misc - by Adrian16 (man) - Norway (Vestfold)
Today, was my first day at my new job, which requires you to wear a special shirt. Come to find out, they only have medium sized shirts. I am an XL. They demanded I wear the shirt anyway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23681) - you deserved it (7726)
On 01/17/2010 at 12:37am - work - by mikey09 (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, after 8 years, I confessed one of my best friends I've been in love with him since we were kiddies. His answer was "Don't worry, I won't stop talking to you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22962) - you deserved it (2557)
On 01/14/2010 at 1:45am - love - by handlin (woman) - Mexico (Nuevo Leon)
Monday 17 June 2013
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