Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

doctorhook86

Offline (5 hours ago) | Search for a member

doctorhook86

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 27 March 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3280
  • Number of comments : 939
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About doctorhook86 : What up, creeper?

Grammar-Nazi sympathizer.

Pet Peeve: statements that end with question marks?

Send me a message! I mostly use the iPhone app though, so expect a reply within 4-6 weeks.

doctorhook86's page activity

Visits<b>thatoneninjadude</b> - 17 hours ago<b>Zman2017</b> - yesterday at 9:55pm<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 1:28am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 6:35pm<b>ZooMzy</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 7:19pm<b>justin1205</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 7:14pm<b>Way2Fast8</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 11:39am<b>PresAgent</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 10:07am<b>twofade</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 4:49am<b>Welshite</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 11:53pm<b>Helpfulman</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 12:53pm<b>hypnotic_peepers</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 9:40pm<b>lachataigne</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 7:06pm<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 4:38am<b>MrKronos</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 12:14am<b>FranticLol101</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 4:37am<b>buckydargon</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 3:39am<b>HanBroman</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 8:53am

doctorhook86's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of doctorhook86's badges

doctorhook86's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to practice putting a condom on with my mouth. Then my roommate walked in on me using my mouth to roll a condom onto a banana. FML

#138318
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14176) - you deserved it (68414)

On 02/25/2009 at 10:01pm - intimacy - by banana (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, we were fooling around and I was just about to orgasm when she looks at my clock and says "I have to go LOST is on in 20 minutes." FML

#135625
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63643) - you deserved it (8172)

On 02/25/2009 at 6:26pm - intimacy - by notmyday (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend masturbating so I said to her, "Need a hand with that?" to which she replied "I'm doing fine here on my own, don't ruin it." FML

#112379
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84785) - you deserved it (21058)

On 02/23/2009 at 8:14am - intimacy - by Anonn (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I jokingly told my mom that I was having sex with my Professor. Her response was, "As long as you're getting A's, honey!" FML

#93640
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28644) - you deserved it (48399)

On 02/21/2009 at 12:36am - intimacy - by acincollege (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I jokingly told my mom that I was having sex with my Professor. Her response was, "As long as you're getting A's, honey!" FML

#93640
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28644) - you deserved it (48399)

On 02/21/2009 at 12:36am - intimacy - by acincollege (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I listened to my room mate having sex from 3 A.M. until 6 A.M. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML

#30994
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41439) - you deserved it (10544)

On 02/12/2009 at 12:25pm - intimacy - by skipper - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML

#18272
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32691) - you deserved it (439785)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:46pm - intimacy - by apricot (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML

#18272
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32691) - you deserved it (439785)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:46pm - intimacy - by apricot (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Mid-thrust she says "I love you, Jeremy." Then in rapid succession, she fires off 2 other names. None of the names were mine. FML

#15968
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49180) - you deserved it (3185)

On 02/08/2009 at 9:14pm - intimacy - by ADT (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidentally sent it to my dad and got a text back saying, "You definitely take after your mom." FML

#9520
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34060) - you deserved it (59491)

On 02/05/2009 at 9:09am - intimacy - by ruffrider (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my wife left me the following voicemail: “Alex, last night was amazing. You took me to places I’ve never been to before. I can’t wait to see you tonight after work.” My name is Rob. We haven’t had sex in two years. FML

#9051
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55151) - you deserved it (8244)

On 02/05/2009 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Barrel - United States (Missouri)

Today, my wife left me the following voicemail: “Alex, last night was amazing. You took me to places I’ve never been to before. I can’t wait to see you tonight after work.” My name is Rob. We haven’t had sex in two years. FML

#9051
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55151) - you deserved it (8244)

On 02/05/2009 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Barrel - United States (Missouri)

Today, I turned on my camera to find pictures of my dad's secretary giving him a blowjob. Minutes later, I hear a scream from another room as my 12-year-old sister discovers similar pictures on HER camera. Mom and dad say it's no big deal. FML

Today, I was having sex with a guy that I just met, and when I thought he was about to orgasm, he actually had an asthma attack. FML

#6446
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38942) - you deserved it (7260)

On 02/03/2009 at 2:34pm - intimacy - by ally (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was having sex with a girl. After we finish, she tells me she already has a boyfriend, and that his penis is larger than mine. FML

#5431
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53307) - you deserved it (9205)

On 02/02/2009 at 1:27pm - intimacy - by FML (man) - United States (Illinois)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: