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djwilson50

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djwilson50

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  • Number of visits : 704
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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djwilson50's page activity

Visits<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 3:32am<b>katydid91</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 9:28pm<b>Jaycee1579</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 3:06am<b>FYLDeep</b> - the 12/19/2011 at 7:15pm

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djwilson50's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss fired me for being on Facebook at work. He did it via a wall post on Facebook saying, "ur fired." Six of my friends liked this. FML

#13997572
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13387) - you deserved it (32981)

On 11/27/2010 at 7:36am - misc - by Flaps - United States (New York)

Today, I was in a rush and forgot to flush the toilet after taking a huge dump. After coming home from work, I check my facebook to find myself tagged by my boyfriend in a photo. The photo was of the toilet, with the caption: "This is what Taco Bell does." FML

#13588009
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12981) - you deserved it (35740)

On 10/25/2010 at 8:32am - misc - by tanya - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to get bloodwork done. I'm deathly afraid of needles. The whole lobby heard me scream as soon as the nurse said 'hello'. FML

#12082057
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16823) - you deserved it (25040)

On 07/24/2010 at 6:50am - health - by breathexali (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was rushing to leave work and get home because I really had to use the bathroom. My cell phone rang and I thought it was my husband, so I answered by saying, "I really have to poop." Yep, not my husband. It was one of my employees, who has the same name. FML

#10516903
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8735) - you deserved it (29520)

On 05/13/2010 at 10:11pm - misc - by BigMouth McRedface (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dog farted. Immediately, he turned around to sniff his stink then furiously licked his butthole. He then licked my nose. FML

#8658906
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24946) - you deserved it (7676)

On 02/26/2010 at 6:13am - animals - by aaalias34 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML

#8079585
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33312) - you deserved it (5168)

On 02/10/2010 at 2:29am - love - by LoveStruck- - United States

Today, my son pooped in his diaper and managed to somehow take it off without my knowledge. He then sat down on the carpet and imitated a dog with worms, all the way down the hallway, through the living room, and into my bedroom. FML

#8042799
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27826) - you deserved it (3778)

On 02/09/2010 at 3:19am - kids - by matchristityler (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother and I were driving through Del Taco. Instead of ordering "Macho Diet Coke", she said "Macho Diet Cock". After correcting herself and pulling up to the window, the employee who goes to my high school gave her the drink and his phone number. FML

#7898835
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23387) - you deserved it (2313)

On 02/05/2010 at 2:52am - misc - by MachoFluster (man) - United States (California)

Today, while at work at a maternity and baby clothes store, I was supposed to send out an email about our "Beat the Clock" sale. After it was sent to over 500 people, I realized that I'd misspelled the subject line. It read, "Beat the Cock Sale." FML

#7336635
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11778) - you deserved it (28433)

On 01/14/2010 at 10:55am - work - by Oops (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was trying to see how far I could get away from the toilet while pissing. Instead I tripped over backwards and pissed all over my face. FML

#7101810
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7588) - you deserved it (66503)

On 01/02/2010 at 8:41am - misc - by pissfaced (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML

#7050962
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8123) - you deserved it (57072)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was in bed with my cat on my lap. No one was around, so I felt comfortable enough to let out a huge fart. What I didn't expect was my cat jumping up and then clawing and biting my crotch. FML

#6971032
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12244) - you deserved it (25252)

On 12/27/2009 at 8:04am - animals - by axwound (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, in the gym, as I bent over to pick up my weights an old man farted right in my face. The stench was appalling. To make matters worse, a girl I've fancied for ages thought it was me and reported it to the instructor. I was told to leave for 'anti-social behavior'. FML

#6020793
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34127) - you deserved it (2502)

On 10/27/2009 at 6:28am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my house got robbed, while I was upstairs taking a dump. FML

#5910203
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43095) - you deserved it (5593)

On 10/20/2009 at 6:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was playing hide and seek with my eight year old cousin. For the past two turns, he had been hiding in the bathroom. I saw the bathroom lights on, yet again, and opened the door with a triumphant "AHA!" It was my Grandma, taking a smelly dump. FML

#5424247
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16401) - you deserved it (33835)

On 09/23/2009 at 6:23am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore



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