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djwilson50

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djwilson50

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  • Number of visits : 674
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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djwilson50's page activity

Visits<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 3:32am<b>katydid91</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 9:28pm<b>Jaycee1579</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 3:06am<b>FYLDeep</b> - the 12/19/2011 at 7:15pm

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djwilson50's favorite FMLs

Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML

#18242988
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32797) - you deserved it (4280)

On 11/14/2011 at 12:23am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was helping a 7 year old student in my martial arts class with his kicks. My reward? A surprisingly powerful kick to the testicles. FML

#17214769
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26334) - you deserved it (6172)

On 07/22/2011 at 6:51am - kids - by TKDConnor92 (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I accidentally asked a one-armed man which arm he wanted me to take blood from. He asked for a different nurse. FML

#17207535
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13836) - you deserved it (43211)

On 07/21/2011 at 7:35pm - work - by ohmygosh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML

#17187875
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38089) - you deserved it (5258)

On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

#17145702
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34542) - you deserved it (7579)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)

Today, I walked in on my father and brother attempting to harmonize their farts. FML

#17109341
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30968) - you deserved it (5239)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:09pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I went to an amateur baseball game with some family and friends. When our team hit a home run, my grandpa took it upon himself to start screaming wildly, removing his prosthetic leg and waving it jubilantly in the air. FML

#17026293
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29560) - you deserved it (5015)

On 07/08/2011 at 9:24am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, my husband and I got married. The only thing that is different so far is that he now thinks that it's okay to shit with the door open. FML

#16558190
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32664) - you deserved it (7994)

On 06/08/2011 at 2:55am - love - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, the girl I have a crush on came over to work on a project. My dad rushed into the room we were in, farted, and then ran out giggling. FML

#16507836
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49912) - you deserved it (5274)

On 06/05/2011 at 12:14am - love - by longlostkid556 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I ate some hardboiled eggs for breakfast, not knowing they were practically rotten. My whole day has consisted of vomit-inducing sulfuric farts and diarrhea. FML

#16234308
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26242) - you deserved it (8479)

On 05/18/2011 at 3:26am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

#15922476
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49175) - you deserved it (5784)

On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -

Today, I was spending Saint Patrick's Day with my girlfriend, when she started pinching me for not wearing green. To my complete shock, when she pinched my nipple, I got the biggest, most noticeable erection I've ever had in my life, and no matter what I did, it wouldn't go away. We were in public. FML

#15355329
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43891) - you deserved it (8696)

On 03/17/2011 at 6:38pm - intimacy - by Mr. Sensitive Nips - United States (Texas)

Today, while at the urinal doing my business, my trousers fell all the way to the ground. As I bent down to pull them back up, my boss walked in the bathroom and thought I was mooning him. FML

#14702634
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22624) - you deserved it (3266)

On 01/24/2011 at 9:33pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was on a plane. When my flight attendant brought me my drink, it had a lid and a straw. He told me, very seriously, "not to spill." No one else got a lid. I'm 18, and apparently I look spill-prone. FML

#14604912
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22308) - you deserved it (2974)

On 01/16/2011 at 8:37pm - misc - by thisisme (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took my kids to the doctor. In the waiting room, a six year old boy walked up to me, punched me in the crotch, and ran away with my glasses. When the kid's parents made him give me my glasses back, he spat on them. FML

#14354901
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30171) - you deserved it (2787)

On 12/27/2010 at 6:29am - kids - by DeadDude -



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