Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

dittoss

Search for a member

dittoss

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 391
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

dittoss's page activity

Visits<b>jarrettd</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 7:20pm<b>guitar666God</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 1:17am

dittoss's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of dittoss's badges

dittoss's favorite FMLs

Today, my coworker was telling me about his mom, when he asked about mine. I told him that I've never met my mom, because she died during my childbirth. It's a very painful subject for me, but all the same, my coworkers have decided they'll now only address me as "Tyrion". FML

#21178277
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43322) - you deserved it (4109)

On 06/17/2014 at 4:30pm - misc - by the lannisters send their retards - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I feel massively depressed, but I can't talk to anyone about it as I'm British. FML

#21177849
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35680) - you deserved it (10032)

On 06/17/2014 at 8:26am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I went to CVS to buy some tampons. The cashier said, "Ewwww... You're on your period." FML

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

#21133982
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63769) - you deserved it (8102)

On 05/08/2014 at 9:55am - love - by STOP (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boss told our production department that we're not allowed to be happy. FML

#21129081
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38186) - you deserved it (3208)

On 05/02/2014 at 8:03pm - work - by i guess (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was watching TV, when I heard a blood-curdling scream from my boyfriend upstairs. It sounded like he was being murdered with a rusty fork, and I rushed to see what the hell was going on, hitting my shin against the stairs in the process. He'd stubbed his toe. FML

#21064600
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38420) - you deserved it (5208)

On 02/18/2014 at 4:15pm - health - by dating a pussy (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was singing while driving through the car park. I blacked out trying to hit a high note, and ended up bashing into another car. FML

#21063366
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22912) - you deserved it (39686)

On 02/17/2014 at 12:43pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

#21031414
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49423) - you deserved it (9297)

On 01/18/2014 at 1:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

#21025234
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56672) - you deserved it (5695)

On 01/12/2014 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I learned, 90 horrifying minutes into a college exam, that my 85-year-old calculus teacher had spent the last three weeks teaching us the wrong chapter. FML

#20997770
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45520) - you deserved it (2760)

On 12/19/2013 at 4:09am - work - by wasted time - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He seemed thrilled, and went to buy some wine to celebrate. He left 11 hours ago and won't come back. FML

#20991978
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53102) - you deserved it (7342)

On 12/14/2013 at 2:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I would like to thank the program designer that put "Set as home page" directly under "Remove from history". FML

#20991949
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37890) - you deserved it (10070)

On 12/14/2013 at 1:38am - misc - by The_Rest_of_the_Story (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was quite drunk so I decided to take a piss kneeling down, so I wouldn't miss. I dropped the toilet seat on my little soldier. FML

Today, while working at McDonald's, an angry customer called asking for his money back. Apparently we'd put 6 cheeseburgers in his bag instead of 5, he ate them all and now feels sick. FML



FML's blog

  • FML's Thanksgiving Special: TGS
  • As many of us know through popular culture, today is Thanksgiving in the US. Come on, we’ve all seen a TV show involving a Thanksgiving dinner or plans to do so that have gone awry due to one of the main…

Wednesday 26 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: