dinkibus

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Offline (the 07/18/2016 at 5:38pm)

dinkibus

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Innisfail, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 17 August 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2972
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About dinkibus : I have been reading fmls for quite a while now and I still love them

dinkibus's page activity

Visits<b>dieana</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 10:17pm<b>tiitsmcgee</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 10:45am<b>Rababco</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 8:38pm<b>susubabe29</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 2:40pm<b>aimeeowl</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 1:56am<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 8:55am<b>mikotomisaki</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 9:49pm<b>shabadabba</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 9:13pm<b>hockey_kid23</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 1:42pm<b>pureNed</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 6:32am<b>edmunson</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 1:52am<b>tampabayfan</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 1:25am<b>C7</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 12:44am<b>CandyDawg</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 12:31am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 9:49pm<b>gracehi</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 8:48pm<b>IceBerge</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 7:20pm<b>VivaLaColdplay</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 6:43pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 3:49am<b>poopfacescolydo</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 6:36pm

dinkibus's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of dinkibus's badges

dinkibus's favorite FMLs

Today, my 6-year-old daughter watched The Lion King for the first time. Now, whenever I ask her to do something, she replies "Hakuna Matata" and doesn't even get up. I think she took "no worries" to mean "don't give a shit about anything". FML

by anon / 12/04/2015 at 7:32pm / United States / Kids

Today, I grazed my hand over the bottom of my desk's keyboard tray, and found something sticky. I gagged when I realized it was jizz, and I immediately washed my hands and wiped everything. I then checked my browser history, which was full of porn. Thanks, roomie. FML

by katluvnc / 12/03/2015 at 9:02am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. He came. A lot. I doubt I'll remember it as anything other than, "The day I found out what sneezing semen feels like." FML

by snortingspunk / 12/03/2015 at 7:52am / South Africa / Intimacy

Today, I burped in front of my crush. Well, not really in front of him. I turned around mid-burp and noticed him, not knowing anyone was there. The surprise made me scream a little, which only amplified the burp. So I made this mighty belch-turned-scream noise, while maintaining eye contact with him. FML

by killmenow / 12/03/2015 at 12:33am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Love

Today, I punched a drunk woman who kept trying to force herself onto my husband. She turned out to be an off-duty cop. FML

by BUSTED. / 12/01/2015 at 2:02pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was verbally and physically attacked in a public pool, because I was swimming in what a grandma claimed was her part of the pool. Since I'm a very tolerant person, I calmly tried to talk some reason into the elderly lady. The lifeguard had to come to protect me. FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2015 at 6:54pm / Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen) / Health

Today, I realized that the "toothpaste" that I'm always cleaning out with my hands from the sink drain is actually my little brother's semen. FML

by cole66 / 11/29/2015 at 1:43pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, my sister accused me of "leading on" her creepy best friend and said I should apologize to him for making him think he was going to get lucky. I haven't talked to the guy in over 5 years, except for one random encounter 2 days ago, where all I said was, "Hi, how have you been?" FML

by lisa / 11/29/2015 at 11:04am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I got caught doing it in her parent's bed by her mom. Instead of making me leave, they forced me to stay for dinner. FML

by aj513 / 11/28/2015 at 8:20pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I had a boyfriend who wanted to wait until marriage before having sex. When I came home, I realised he must have married my roommate. FML

by Anonymous / 11/27/2015 at 1:42am / France (Corse) / Intimacy

Today, I managed to accidentally drop an entire cake on my laptop's keyboard. There's so much frosting stuck under the keys, I have no idea how I'm going to clean it out. FML

by hating my life / 11/26/2015 at 2:57am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my 4-year-old twin boys are fighting because they both want to watch the SAME show on Netflix. They don't want the other one to choose, because somehow that invalidates their own choice, even though they both get to watch what they want, which is "Barbie, life in the dream house". FML

by Anonymous / 11/25/2015 at 12:13pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, while changing my daughter's diaper, I lifted up her butt to wipe her, which coincidentally caused her to fart. I hadn't wiped her yet so the force of air caused poop to fly at me at high speed, landing on my chest and face. My husband burst out laughing, saying, "You've been ass-blasted!" FML

by coolest_mom / 11/25/2015 at 1:00am / Kids

Today, I had sex with the guy who had been the main subject of my bean-flicking fantasies since I met him. It was the absolute worst sex of my life. I guess some things are just better left to the imagination. FML

by WhatALetdown / 11/24/2015 at 7:26pm / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy

Today, my anxiety cockblocked me. I was in the middle of a wank, about to come, when I suddenly freaked out and had to stop and check to make sure I didn't have any homework due tomorrow. FML

by helpme / 11/24/2015 at 1:34am / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy