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di973

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di973

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1110
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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di973's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of di973's badges

di973's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a boyfriend who wanted to wait until marriage before having sex. When I came home, I realised he must have married my roommate. FML

#21497342
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29941) - you deserved it (1928)

On 11/27/2015 at 1:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous - France (Corse)

Today, my 4-year-old twin boys are fighting because they both want to watch the SAME show on Netflix. They don't want the other one to choose, because somehow that invalidates their own choice, even though they both get to watch what they want, which is "Barbie, life in the dream house". FML

#21496646
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22966) - you deserved it (2259)

On 11/25/2015 at 12:13pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out my fiancé is already married when his wife showed up at my door. That's about the same time she found her husband is gay, and that Ashley can be a man's name. FML

#21494790
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28025) - you deserved it (2604)

On 11/20/2015 at 9:43am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was so tired when I got home from work, I took off my bra without removing my shirt which I've done so often it is second nature. I successfully removed the bra, then snagged the clasp on a loose shirt thread, causing my bra to take on a life of its own and slap me in the face. FML

#21491942
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20875) - you deserved it (3042)

On 11/13/2015 at 12:47am - misc - by fryebaby623 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth worked on. I got tongue-tied and instead of asking if they could anesthetize me, I accidentally asked if they could euthanize me. FML

#21488826
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20191) - you deserved it (2344)

On 11/05/2015 at 3:52pm - health - by EnderHorse - United States (Ohio)

Today, my father, who is not familiar with keyboards, had me register his new email account for him at the public library. His username choice? "Wang dang sweet poon tang". People heard. FML

#21488619
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20854) - you deserved it (1857)

On 11/05/2015 at 12:05am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, I learned the hard way that my boyfriend lied about getting a vasectomy before we met, in spite of knowing how phobic I am of pregnancy and kids. His defense? "I figured you'd change your mind someday, because all you chicks love babies." FML

Today, my long time girlfriend flew across the country to visit. My asshat roommate decided to introduce himself to her while I was in the bathroom. She left and won't answer my calls. He won't tell me what he said to her. FML

Today, I awoke to the sound of my neighbor's attacking my car with a baseball bat accusing me of calling the cops on them. I did call the cops on them, after they screamed at me last night, drunkenly, to call the cops for them because they thought they were being robbed. FML

#21478578
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26255) - you deserved it (1688)

On 10/11/2015 at 11:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my dad introduced me as his pet orangutan. I'm a redhead. FML

Today, I was taking a long, relaxing, hot bath with my girlfriend after a long day. She had fallen asleep in my arms and everything was perfect - until I noticed the water around us had started turning yellow as she pissed herself in her sleep. FML

#21473282
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29039) - you deserved it (2748)

On 09/27/2015 at 12:05pm - intimacy - by itsbeenalongday - United States (California)

Today, I finally lost enough weight to fit into the beautiful dress that I ordered for my senior prom. I graduated from high school in 2010. FML

#21467148
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23107) - you deserved it (4596)

On 09/11/2015 at 1:57am - misc - by All Dressed Up With No Place To Go (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML

#21458825
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25427) - you deserved it (6718)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:25am - kids - by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay (man) - Malta

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex, and he asked me to tell him what I wanted him to do. I said I wanted him to make me scream and cum. To which he replied, "Okay, be realistic now". FML



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