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derpies

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derpies

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  • Number of visits : 1126
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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derpies's page activity

Visits<b>Squtchy</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 2:47am<b>Faith13</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 6:29am<b>haylburg</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 12:10am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 7:47pm<b>Kiki242</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 5:54am<b>Silent_Thrill</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 11:09pm<b>ShrinkToMySize</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 5:37am<b>Suptnik</b> - the 12/23/2012 at 10:54pm

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derpies's favorite FMLs

my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monster under his bed . FML

#18775724
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27647) - you deserved it (6962)

On 01/11/2012 at 3:08pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Arab Emirates

TODAY, I LOOKED INTO MY SINK'S GARBAGE DISPOSAL 4 THE FRST TIME SINCE I MOVED IN TWO MONTHS AGO. APPARENTLY, THE PUTRID SMELL WAS NOT THE FOOD I'VE BEEN THROWING DOWN IT, BUT INSTEAD, A NOW WHAT APPERES TO BE MUTILATED LITTER OF RATS. FML

#18772081
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28501) - you deserved it (3348)

On 01/11/2012 at 12:23am - misc - by RatFailure (woman) - United States

Today , my boyfriend changd his relationship status on Facebook to ( Single ) an his status to ( I'm not kidding , leave yur key on the counter. ) FML

#18763355
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36826) - you deserved it (3511)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:52am - love - by Janie (woman) - United States

Today.!! !! My Teacher Startd Talking About Me Quietly To The Stuffd Cat.!! !! Calld Rufus.!! !! That She Keeps On Her Desk !! FML

#18763079
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22466) - you deserved it (2056)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:25am - work - by jumbledgirl (woman) - United States

Today, I cummad homa with a friand to find mom scratching dad's butt with a fork . FML

#18754752
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31016) - you deserved it (2318)

On 01/09/2012 at 4:39am - misc - by maruskasommers (woman) - Czech Republic (Pardubicky kraj)

Today, I went to the movies on a date. My chair made a fart sound while I movd around a little, so mah date thought I'd let one rip. He then let out a really horrendously smelling one to make me feel less embarrassd, giving me a reassuring look. fat FML

#18753577
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31263) - you deserved it (5852)

On 01/09/2012 at 1:14am - love - by Whyme (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was bored and started touching myself watching TV!! My mother walked into mah bedroom with a phone in her hand and yelled, ( Stop jacking off and talk to yur grandmother!! ) big fat FML

#18749585
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17314) - you deserved it (31501)

On 01/08/2012 at 7:43pm - intimacy - by caught - United States (Washington)

Today, mah mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then looool informed me that, for as long as mah girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21191) - you deserved it (40952)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, I Was Cooking With Super Hot Ghost Peppers. The Package Said "After Handling Them Not To Touch Your Eyes, Nose Or Pets". They Should've Added "penis" To That List. FML

#18729935
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12136) - you deserved it (55813)

On 01/06/2012 at 9:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, My Dad Decided That He Shouldn't Have To Wear Clothe In The Privacy Of His Own Home. FML

#18724307
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27844) - you deserved it (2950)

On 01/06/2012 at 6:25am - misc - by Anna (woman) - United States

TODAY MY BOYFRIEND DUMPED ME ALL BECAUSE E'S SCARED OF MY MOTER. FML

#18715469
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28655) - you deserved it (5101)

On 01/05/2012 at 11:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I had a job interview. I was feeling good about it until I saw the interviewer. It was a guy I had sex with and never calld again. He rememberd me too. FML

TODAY, AFTER MONTHS OF DATING, I ASKED MY BOYFRIEND IF HE WANTED TO TAKE THINGS TO THE NEXT LEVEL . HE TOLD ME THAT HE COULDN'T HAVE SEX WITH ME BECAUSE OF HIS RELIGIOUS BELIEFS . I WOULD'VE BEEN FINE WITH THIS IF IT WEREN'T FIR THE FACT THAT I KNOW HE AND HIS FAMILY R ALL ATHIESTS . FML

#18710247
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32761) - you deserved it (4091)

On 01/04/2012 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by Anon - United States (California)

Tadayhen I woke up I checked my phone for messages, only to hear a woman screaming that I have been sleeping with her husband and that she is sending her 'people' after me. I have never met said husband. I panicked for hours only to receive a call telling me she had dialed the wrong number. FML

#18705736
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26825) - you deserved it (2381)

On 01/04/2012 at 12:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

TODAY , I HAD TO ASK MY GRLFRIEND TO PLEASE STOP TELLING ME ABOUT HER EX'S PENIS. FML

#18705552
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45976) - you deserved it (4330)

On 01/04/2012 at 11:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)



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