depocadoll

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depocadoll

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 827
  • Number of comments : 85
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About depocadoll : I have more than I deserve, and I get to kiss my other half every morning.

depocadoll's page activity

Visits<b>Fennex3</b> - the 09/08/2016 at 6:55pm<b>SashaTaras</b> - the 08/17/2016 at 8:09am<b>EvilPandaxD</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 9:49am<b>paigexox0</b> - the 07/03/2016 at 3:05am<b>Blizzicus</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 2:05pm<b>DippinGrizzly907</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 11:00pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 12:33am<b>AwkwardBookworm</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 6:26pm<b>tweak2011</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 12:14pm<b>allorex</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 8:51pm<b>konan__</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 4:07am<b>meg0606</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 6:45am<b>heroqucas</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 6:21am<b>max367</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 12:23pm<b>ncbb5</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 1:57pm<b>max_dilbe</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 8:42am<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 5:54pm<b>Celeden</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 8:36pm

Fucked!<b>Violenna</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 5:08am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 6:36pm

depocadoll's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of depocadoll's badges

depocadoll's favorite FMLs

Today, I was teaching my daughter how to drive. We were passing by a merge lane; I told her to slow down and let a green car merge in front of us. She said, "Fuck the green car" and sped up, colliding with it. Apparently she didn't know that would happen. FML

by Anonymous / 07/14/2013 at 11:40pm / United States (Maryland) / Transportation

Today, my naked boyfriend walked up to me with my towel around his neck and with a hard-on, then declared he was "The Penis Man" and slapped me with his junk. I thought I was dating a man, not a man-child. FML

by peniswoman / 07/14/2013 at 1:03pm / United Kingdom (Renfrewshire) / Intimacy

Today, I got to wash my ex-wife's dishes at her apartment while her new boyfriend played with my daughter in the living room. FML

by Anonymous / 05/27/2013 at 7:34pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, working at a fast food restaurant, I was cleaning dishes in the back. I started to sing to myself. During the chorus I heard the echo of my voice in my ear. My boss had pushed the talk button on my headset so every staff member and everyone in the lobby could hear me over the intercom. FML

by legit247 / 05/10/2013 at 12:44am / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I overheard my boyfriend admitting that he's only dating me because having me around "sucks a bit less than fucking my own hand". FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2013 at 5:00pm / Germany / Love

Today, through sheer luck, I got talking to an actor from the Harry Potter films who I've had a crush on since I was about ten. I tried to play it cool, and pretend I didn't know who he was. Then my phone rang, with the Harry Potter theme tune. FML

by itsellie27 / 04/30/2013 at 6:23pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving and a cute guy was staring at me. Flattered, I smiled at him, but he didn't even react. I realized he wasn't admiring me he was admiring my truck. This is the 5th time this week. My truck gets more game than I do. FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2013 at 10:50am / United States / Transportation

Today, I finally hooked up with the guy that I have been in love with forever. If there is such a thing as soul mates, this guy is it. He's my best friend in the whole world. It was the worst sex I have ever had. FML

by Live Sweet / 04/25/2013 at 1:33am / Intimacy

Today, I went to my grandmom's house for an hour or so. When I came home, my boyfriend was on the bed, covered in the sheets and about to cry. Turns out he taped his ballsack to his leg and couldn't get it off because it "hurts too much." I'm 24 and he's 26. FML

by anonymous / 04/23/2013 at 5:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband rejected sleeping with me because he wants to "save his energy" for building his custom car. Apparently, I'm a "distraction." FML

by Anonymous / 04/23/2013 at 9:38am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning how to spend the day together. When I suggested we start off with some fun in bed, then get some pizza and play his favorite video game, he sighed, "Can't we just go straight to gaming?" FML

by Anonymous / 04/22/2013 at 4:16pm / United States / Love

Today, I was babysitting, and after the kids fell asleep I started hiding the Easter candy. They woke up when I was half-done, and it didn't take them long to figure out what was going on. They won't stop crying, and every time I go near them, they scream "LIAR!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/01/2013 at 12:02pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, one of my 5-year-old son's teeth fell out, but he's quite scatterbrained and he lost it. He did however find my vibrating duck under my pillow, and is now crying because he thinks that I stole his tooth so that the tooth fairy would bring me a toy. FML

by laptitesouris / 03/31/2013 at 7:35pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Kids

Today, my cat learned how to open doors. Ever since then she's been running up to my room, opening my door, and running away. My cat is playing ding-dong ditch. FML

by Apes / 03/25/2013 at 3:18am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML

by Notaplacetogo / 02/17/2013 at 1:45am / United States (California) / Intimacy