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deltoramastr

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deltoramastr

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 19 July 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 767
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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deltoramastr's page activity

Visits<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 7:49am<b>memememe2</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 10:22pm<b>Dannyboy365</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 7:21pm<b>globsavethequeen</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 5:14pm<b>andrew_weaver15</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 10:24pm<b>lndala</b> - the 04/30/2013 at 7:59am<b>emmmilyyismee</b> - the 02/02/2013 at 1:04pm<b>Catkam623</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 8:42am<b>_Anonymous_1234</b> - the 01/02/2013 at 4:11am<b>fabdancer95</b> - the 12/23/2012 at 6:42am<b>heartemopants</b> - the 12/22/2012 at 4:54pm

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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deltoramastr's favorite FMLs

Today, while attempting the Italian Chandelier with my girlfriend, I heard a popping noise, and then had a sharp pain in my dick. Turns out I "broke" it. Instead of calling 911 immediately, my girlfriend remarked how my now black and blue penis looked like a Smurf. FML

#20003323
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27518) - you deserved it (5844)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37221) - you deserved it (4005)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I almost got kidnapped. Again. FML

#19707961
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31473) - you deserved it (4250)

On 05/31/2012 at 1:28am - misc - by gonavybeatarmy - United States (California)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home while my parents were at work, and things got a little heated. We lost track of time, because the next thing we knew, my dad burst into the living room. He doubled over laughing and asked how much I paid her. FML

#19592983
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27366) - you deserved it (5405)

On 05/08/2012 at 4:46pm - intimacy - by mal (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I discovered how startling it is to wake up by having your cat springboard off your face. The intended prey? Two fornicating geckos on the ceiling. FML

Today, after my credit card was stolen, the thief made donations to charitable associations. Now I feel bad for asking for the money back. FML

#18973351
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35179) - you deserved it (3419)

On 02/01/2012 at 11:35pm - money - by zobara - Switzerland

Today, I got into a car accident. The other party left the scene immediately after without exchanging insurance information. Deer can be so rude. FML

#18267814
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26812) - you deserved it (7950)

On 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML

#17874410
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25729) - you deserved it (6093)

On 09/30/2011 at 10:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my husband bought me a cinnamon roll because my blood sugar was dangerously low. My first bite was easily the most delicious thing I'd eaten since getting pregnant. As I sat in frosting coated ecstasy, my husband snatched up the rest of the pastry and finished it himself. FML

#17511750
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28559) - you deserved it (4002)

On 08/18/2011 at 5:41pm - health - by AmySweet - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML

#17294808
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36880) - you deserved it (9560)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

#17032745
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10454) - you deserved it (75574) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2011 at 8:11pm - love - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version

Today, at 2 in the morning, my water broke. I called my mom and woke her up to come watch our older kid, while my husband and I went to the hospital. After being tested at the hospital, I was told I had just peed myself. FML

#16074801
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41049) - you deserved it (8160)

On 05/07/2011 at 1:58am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was fired from my job. Apparently getting shot is no valid reason to stay home. FML

#15833093
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58476) - you deserved it (4398)

On 04/18/2011 at 11:09am - work - by davka -

Today, I came home to a lease violation and a $220 fine after a routine pest control visit. The violation: my single beta fish in a small bowl. FML

#15023779
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24125) - you deserved it (4152)

On 02/18/2011 at 12:19am - animals - by Username -

Today, I sent a picture to my girlfriend of my erect penis with a quote saying "It's waiting for you." She responded with a picture of her left hand showing her left ring finger with a quote saying "It's waiting for you too." FML

#14120118
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12313) - you deserved it (81543)

On 12/07/2010 at 1:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)



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