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delphina

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delphina

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 11 July 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 47085
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About delphina : Fuckin' epic.

delphina's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:13pm<b>GumboVariation</b> - the 12/29/2009 at 4:30am<b>ImDoingYourMom</b> - the 10/11/2009 at 5:38pm<b>loui_h</b> - the 07/19/2009 at 7:44am<b>hoshica</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 7:45pm<b>whphoto</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 6:27pm<b>username666</b> - the 04/27/2009 at 5:13pm<b>prb</b> - the 04/22/2009 at 7:09am<b>Rachelgrl1989</b> - the 04/21/2009 at 6:00pm<b>meowrr</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 5:17pm<b>fmlbaha</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 3:34pm

delphina's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

delphina's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to confession. I told the priest that I had an intimate relationship with a woman that I'm not married to. He chuckled and said, "You know, lying is a sin too." I wasn't lying. FML

#480459
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62842) - you deserved it (8592)

On 03/19/2009 at 11:34pm - misc - by churchgoer (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got the courage to ask my mom if I could go to the movies alone on my first date with my new boyfriend. She said ok, which was surprising because she never lets me go anywhere alone. When I got to the theatre with him I saw my mom. She had saved seats for us. FML

#474818
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69147) - you deserved it (4021)

On 03/19/2009 at 8:07pm - misc - by shelteredchild (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to have sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pockets. Turns out, he had written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML

#473847
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (125334) - you deserved it (12710)

On 03/19/2009 at 7:31pm - intimacy - by ufhdafuhds (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, I was enjoying my last day of Spring Break in Panama City. I got up to dance on the stage at the Holiday Inn in front of hundreds of college kids. I tried to be sexy by turning around and bending over. My friends took pictures and my bloody tampon string was hanging out the whole time. FML

#470055
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33417) - you deserved it (87876)

On 03/19/2009 at 5:10pm - intimacy - by LindseyS (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got a call from a girl I know, asking if i could babysit her little brother at my house tonight. I said yes. When the boy came over he mentioned that his sister was having a party and didn't want him there. Turns out all my friends were invited except me. FML

#464379
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80793) - you deserved it (4116)

On 03/19/2009 at 11:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend at his college and when I walked into the dorm he was lying in his bed with another girl. When he saw me he simply said, "April Fool's!" It's March 19th. FML

#461201
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (138485) - you deserved it (8562)

On 03/19/2009 at 3:40am - intimacy - by cmerr (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I learned I made the dean's honor list for my college for the first time since attending. I asked my dad if he was proud of me, to which he replied, "when you're as successful as your brother, I'll be proud." My brother is a Chippendale's dancer. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I were at his house having sex. After about 30 minutes, his mom came home and was knocking on the door asking "What are you doing?" Thinking I might have a chance to sneak out, I got dressed real quiet. Then my boyfriend answers, "Zoe. I'm doing Zoe." FML

#459925
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82141) - you deserved it (15024)

On 03/19/2009 at 2:05am - intimacy - by Zoe123 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw a video in class about women aged 65+ and their sex lives. An elderly, blind woman was having sex at her senior's home. I don't know what's worse, watching an hour-long documentary on this, or the fact that these women are having way more sex than I am. FML

#459732
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82359) - you deserved it (9482)

On 03/19/2009 at 1:46am - intimacy - by notenoughsex (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I saw my boyfriend for the last time for two years. When we got back from dinner, we sat in his truck for a little while to talk. A few minutes later, my mom comes flying out of my house screaming, "Satan is here, and he is tempting you!" That is the last memory he will have of me. FML

#458180
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81286) - you deserved it (4378)

On 03/19/2009 at 12:42am - love - by Fwick (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I went to a party to see my crush. He offered me a drink and I declined telling him that I don't drink because alcohol makes people act stupid and crash their cars. He then saw me back into a car parked on the street and shatter my backlights as I reversed from the driveway to go home. FML

#457666
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15552) - you deserved it (67008)

On 03/19/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by icantdrive (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw an attractive man outside the club I was trying to get into to. We talked, and ended up having sex in my apartment. The next day when I was dropping him off, I discovered he was homeless and was outside the club begging for money. My house is suddenly out of bread and cheese. FML

#448904
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30728) - you deserved it (136777)

On 03/18/2009 at 8:10pm - intimacy - by Melaknee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was leaving to go over to a friend's and my parents suddenly ask if I'm gay. I reply that no, I'm bisexual. My mom then asks if I've ever made out with someone of the same sex and I say yes. She turns to my dad and says 'I told you so. You owe me $20'. My parents bet on my sexuality. FML

#446324
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99990) - you deserved it (24775)

On 03/18/2009 at 6:42pm - love - by Syferix (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I received a letter in the mail from my Grandma about how much she adores and loves me. Then it went into detail about how much prettier, smarter, and successful I am than my sister, Leah. I am Leah. She mixed up the letters to the wrong envelopes. FML

#444833
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71394) - you deserved it (3004)

On 03/18/2009 at 5:47pm - misc - by leah12 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was taking a shower with my new boyfriend for the first time. Last night was the first night we spent together. As I was washing my hair, I looked down at my feet and noticed yellow water. Some of the warm water I felt on my feet was not from the shower head. FML

#436547
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98102) - you deserved it (18203)

On 03/18/2009 at 9:47am - intimacy - by Marcela (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)



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