delphina

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delphina

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 11 July 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 50747
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About delphina : Fuckin' epic.

delphina's page activity

Visits<b>sammy011</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 5:03pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 8:43pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:13pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 1:16am<b>GumboVariation</b> - the 12/29/2009 at 4:30am<b>ImDoingYourMom</b> - the 10/11/2009 at 5:38pm<b>loui_h</b> - the 07/19/2009 at 7:44am<b>hoshica</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 7:45pm<b>whphoto</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 6:27pm<b>username666</b> - the 04/27/2009 at 5:13pm<b>prb</b> - the 04/22/2009 at 7:09am<b>Rachelgrl1989</b> - the 04/21/2009 at 6:00pm<b>meowrr</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 5:17pm<b>fmlbaha</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 3:34pm

delphina's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

delphina's favorite FMLs

Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML

by Wmsys32pr9 / 03/30/2009 at 1:06am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML

by Wmsys32pr9 / 03/30/2009 at 1:06am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the phone to make a call and had heard it all. FML

by Bucko321 / 03/29/2009 at 9:18pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I found my concert tickets that I've been trying to find for the last 2 weeks in my mom's closet. When I asked why she had them, she said she felt the concert was inappropriate for me so she hid them. I'm 20. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 4:19pm / United States (California) / Money

Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 4:18pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I came home a few days early from a 3-month business trip. As I opened my apartment door, hoping to surprise my girlfriend, the man she's apparently been cheating on me with promptly punched me in the face. He thought I was a burglar. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 3:42pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I was riding in the car with my new boyfriend. He had 'something serious' to tell me. He started to emotionally confess his addiction to masturbation. In detail. The drive was 2 hours long. FML

by linren / 03/28/2009 at 2:40pm / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy

Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML

by Chelsea / 03/28/2009 at 1:33pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend I went into his shower to freshen up. Where I saw an open bottle of pubic lice shampoo. FML

by lice / 03/28/2009 at 9:34am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I tried having intercourse with my boyfriend, and about 30 seconds in, I heard flipping. He was looking at a porn magazine. "It's to keep my erection" he answered. FML

by VampiresSayRawr / 03/27/2009 at 11:16pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my mother was vaccuming the stairs. Trying to be polite, I climbed over the banister to the floor above, so I wouldn't interrupt her. She looked at me odd and said, "I'm surprised that held your weight." The banister is maple and steel. FML

by Anonymity / 03/27/2009 at 11:15pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to my guy friend about prom. I told him I was turned down by 7 guys. So he said "Well, you could always ask me." I then said "Do you want to go to prom with me?" His response was "Nope...now that's 8!" FML

by rejected / 03/27/2009 at 8:38pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I was packing my son's lunch and we ran out of water bottles. I asked my 16 years old to run to the store. She didnt want to but gave me one she had. After dropping my son off, my daughter frantically told me she made a mistake. I sent my second grader to school with a bottle of vodka. FML

by badmom / 03/27/2009 at 2:42pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going to a stoplight party. Green shirt=single, yellow=hard to get and red=taken. I show up wearing a red shirt and I see my boyfriend in a green shirt. Thinking it was a mistake, I ask him jokingly why he isn't wearing red. He looks at me weird and says, "Oh, you didn't get my text?" FML

by 1234567898765432 / 03/27/2009 at 12:47pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I was going down on my girlfriend when I noticed a hickey near her hip. I said, "wow, last night was crazy, I don't even remember doing that!". Without even interrupting the action, she simply said, "You didn't". FML

by tehhotness / 03/27/2009 at 10:13am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy