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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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deep_smoochies

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deep_smoochies
  • Town/Country : Mauritius
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 29 October 1989 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 248
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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deep_smoochies's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend broke up me with for being the "perfect boyfriend". Apparently I'm the best boyfriend she's ever had, and she didn't know how to take it. So she dumped me. FML

#6414657 (181)

I agree, your life sucks (31809) - you deserved it (2297)

On 11/22/2009 at 10:59pm - love - by Micheal (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I applied some things I learned reading a "How to please a woman" book. My wife was in heaven until it was over, then she started crying and yelling about the only way I would learn those things is if I was having an affair. I explained but she doesn't believe me. FML

#6363732 (59)

I agree, your life sucks (16540) - you deserved it (1350)

On 11/19/2009 at 12:16am - intimacy - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was cheering up the girl I've been in love with for years. She was having one of those, "I'm ugly, no one wants to be with me" days. To cheer herself up, she said to me, "If you were a hot guy, you'd date me, right?" FML

#6217069 (186)

I agree, your life sucks (30600) - you deserved it (2735)

On 11/08/2009 at 7:34pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was playing a game of truth or dare in a group with a girl I liked. She was dared to kiss me, but then the group decided that that was too cruel of a dare. FML

#6095945 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (34968) - you deserved it (2838)

On 11/01/2009 at 1:30am - love - by Loser (man) - United States (California)

Today, working my pizza delivery job, I got a $45 parking ticket for parking in a no stopping zone. I argued with the bylaw enforcement officer, but no luck. I was so pissed, I yelled at him: "You have the worst job in the world", to which he replied: " Buddy, you deliver pizza!" FML

#5876568 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (6408) - you deserved it (33287)

On 10/18/2009 at 9:39am - work - by nick (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my 5 year old daughter came back from a playdate at her new friend's house. Apparently, while she was there, her friend taught her a new way to get anything she wanted. That would be holding her breath until she passes out. FML

#5876534 (177)

I agree, your life sucks (29724) - you deserved it (2024)

On 10/18/2009 at 9:36am - kids - by Pleasebreathe (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was going to ask this girl I love to homecoming. I set up a scavenger hunt, and my friend led her through it. At the end of the scavenger hunt I had a note that said, "Homecoming?" She said yes and hugged my friend. When I told her it was me who was asking, she laughed and said no. FML

#5058289 (160)

I agree, your life sucks (34371) - you deserved it (7014)

On 09/05/2009 at 10:16am - love - by thisrllysucks (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I came home from a business trip, I walked in to the house to find my husband nowhere to be seen. I called out his name and he came round the corner saying "Coming baby." When he came through the door he said "Oh it's you..." FML

#4923789 (69)

I agree, your life sucks (43824) - you deserved it (1754)

On 08/30/2009 at 3:22am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my friend snuck up on me and yelled, "Gotcha!" I screamed and dropped a gallon of blood-red paint on my new, white kitchen floor. Now it looks like I've murdered someone in my kitchen. FML

#4876384 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (31615) - you deserved it (2787)

On 08/28/2009 at 2:11am - misc - by kitchencrime (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, on the train on the way to my mother's house, I was playing Mariokart with my son. He got a 'bomb' item, and yelled quite loudly, "I have a bomb!". Panic ensued. We got thrown off the train at the next stop. FML

#4874486 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (37841) - you deserved it (4639)

On 08/28/2009 at 12:41am - kids - by mariokarter (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my sister went into early labor. Instead of telling me, my mom turns to my dog and says "Guess what? You're going to be an uncle!" Our new dog ranks higher than me in our family's metaphorical food chain. FML

#4726515 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (22259) - you deserved it (1807)

On 08/22/2009 at 1:39am - animals - by bigscarypuppy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I listened to a voice mail from my mom about how she misses me and cant wait to see me when I get back from vacation. Thinking she hung up, my mother then had a conversation with my aunt about how quiet the house is without me and how she'd be blessed if I didn't come home. FML

#4725507 (44)

I agree, your life sucks (26964) - you deserved it (1573)

On 08/22/2009 at 1:03am - misc - by taylor124 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got a report telling me how I had handled a mystery shopper at work. In this report I found out that instead of saying "Thank you" I had said "Have a nice day, take care." This kept me from getting my $150 bonus. FML

#4724946 (140)

I agree, your life sucks (32867) - you deserved it (1569)

On 08/22/2009 at 12:43am - work - by elipses (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was my 17th birthday. My mom forgot and my best friend is out of town. The highlight of my day? The guy at McDonalds slipped an extra apple pie in my bag. FML

#4719032 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (27709) - you deserved it (1784)

On 08/21/2009 at 9:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I lost a bet with my girlfriend. I now have to wear a shirt saying "Worlds Smallest Penis" everywhere I go for a month. FML

#4627317 (190)

I agree, your life sucks (14362) - you deserved it (46837)

On 08/18/2009 at 12:34pm - love - by badtimingdude (man) - Mauritius



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