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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I am in a very long line at the supermarket, gazing about in complete boredom when I spot a lady cradling what appears to be a cute newborn baby. Being enamored of all babies, I get off the line, go over and say "Oh, what a cute little baby!" The lady was holding a coconut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5639) - you deserved it (29158)
On 10/10/2009 at 6:35pm - misc - by BEE (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I learned that the gap between the elevator and the 6th floor landing of my apartment building is approximately one key's width wide. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30981) - you deserved it (2157)
On 09/28/2009 at 11:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I woke up from a nap on my new bed to see my phone lit up with new texts. My friend sent out "Wanna test out my new bed?" as a mass text while I was asleep to every boy in my phone. Mark will be here in an hour, Jon wants to know what I'm wearing, and my ex's new girlfriend is not amused. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28066) - you deserved it (2260)
On 09/20/2009 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anathema_360 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I saw a youtube video of a guy scratching a knife and a screwdriver on his Ipod and at the end he showed how there was no scratches and the Ipod screen was clean. So I took my brand new Ipod touch and did the same with a knife. It didn't work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9104) - you deserved it (148621)
On 09/19/2009 at 5:36pm - misc - by MgmEboy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found out that I had my first born child. It's a boy. I found out on facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36737) - you deserved it (10108)
On 09/19/2009 at 4:47am - misc - by josh (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I got a promotion to management at work. My employer decided to give the 'non-management' employees a really nice raise. Which means the job I had before my promotion is now paying more than the job I have now. Did I just get demoted? FML
I agree, your life sucks (31544) - you deserved it (1494)
On 09/13/2009 at 2:12am - work - by ofcourse (woman) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, I took this girl out that I've been crushing on for 2 years to a fancy restaurant. At one point during the date, I had to get up to take a massive dump. As I was walking back to the table, a little boy stood up and shouted, "THAT'S THE POOPOO MAN" in front of the whole restaurant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31601) - you deserved it (3487)
On 09/12/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by taman (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67484) - you deserved it (5187)
On 08/20/2009 at 10:51am - love - by demk (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I needed new business cards so I went to design and print some. After I designed, I was happy with them and printed off 100 copies. I live at a place called Canal Rocks. I forgot the 'C'. I now have 76 business cards which say 'anal rocks.' I already distributed 24. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11688) - you deserved it (31166)
On 08/20/2009 at 9:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I was eating with a friend while walking on the sidewalk. A couple of pigeons were bothering us so I threw a fry onto the street. As a flock of pigeons were gathering around the fry, a truck drove by. Only four survived. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13575) - you deserved it (32529)
On 08/20/2009 at 2:22am - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, there were some wasps getting in my bedroom from a hole in the frame of my window. I went outside with some spray and took out their entrance. What I didnt know is that when you spray wasps, they go the other direction. I now have 60+ wasps flying around my bedroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24851) - you deserved it (16230)
On 08/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by BearGrillz - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I woke up with my girl laying next to me in bed. When she woke up we started to get hot and heavy but all of a sudden our cat hops on the bed. I guess the cat was more important cause my girl got up started playing it instead of me. Cockblocked by another pussy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44833) - you deserved it (5881)
On 08/16/2009 at 1:04pm - intimacy - by Steve (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, as a supervisor at a water park, several clients came up to me and complained about a topless girl in our wave pool. I found the girl, called her out, and politely told her that she was not allowed in the pool without a top. "She" was a fat 15 year old boy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42208) - you deserved it (5131)
On 08/12/2009 at 4:13pm - misc - by auslander (man) - Switzerland (Zurich)
Today, I was at the Wild Animal Park. There were bees everywhere. One brave bee, thinking he was Mr. Macho, flew right down my tank top in between my boobs. I freaked the hell out and ended up screaming and pulling down my shirt to get the bee out. I flashed about 10 kids and their families. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38365) - you deserved it (6679)
On 07/28/2009 at 1:00am - kids - by bsaucedo (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while spray painting a rocking horse for my kids I left the can outside in the sun. When I picked it up it was hot to the touch and I dropped it. It exploded on impact and now I am more blue than the rocking horse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30421) - you deserved it (14413)
On 07/27/2009 at 4:08pm - animals - by usafprog (man) - United States (Alabama)
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