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deadman15

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deadman15

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2329
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About deadman15 : Clearly this is a gay username, deal with it.

deadman15's page activity

Visits<b>carleybeak</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 9:54am<b>InfernoVivo</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 1:13am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 12:56pm<b>pacelily</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 4:43am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 11:54pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 9:18am<b>shawnygreen</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 1:25am<b>jonsmith01973</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 12:14am<b>golden_warrior</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 3:36pm

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You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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deadman15's favorite FMLs

Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML

#20985190
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46631) - you deserved it (5138)

On 12/08/2013 at 3:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML

#20981890
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39136) - you deserved it (21748)

On 12/05/2013 at 5:26pm - misc - by possibly a sweater (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

#20909921
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57181) - you deserved it (3381)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. My dad was having a bad day and was rude from the outset, but things went to total hell when he started screaming that he'd "kill" our microwave if it didn't "shut the hell up". My girlfriend now thinks we're a family of abusive psychos. FML

#20887758
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37714) - you deserved it (2852)

On 09/19/2013 at 1:32pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad told me I was folding my laundry all wrong. I said with a smirk, "A little clothes-minded, are we?" He slapped me. Hard. FML

#20865687
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49578) - you deserved it (10686)

On 09/03/2013 at 2:31am - misc - by fml (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML

#20865525
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42372) - you deserved it (4699)

On 09/03/2013 at 12:13am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

#20858245
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55972) - you deserved it (4427)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Thanks everyone (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my husband wanted to try anal for the first time. His attempt to sound romantic was him saying, "Open your buns, the meat is ready." FML

#20767385
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55069) - you deserved it (7754)

On 07/06/2013 at 5:21pm - intimacy - by hamburger - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was out on a leisurely jog. Out of nowhere, a car slowed down in the street, and a passenger screamed "HAPPY 4TH OF JULY, MOTHERFUCKER," before tossing a lit Roman Candle at my feet. FML

#20763905
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46159) - you deserved it (4017)

On 07/04/2013 at 6:30pm - health - by Your ass... Grab it... (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go out skating. I guess I took a wrong turn into a bad neighborhood, because I ended up being chased several blocks by a group of jacked-up thugs wielding baseball bats and taunting, "Skate or die, homie!" FML

#20673360
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44374) - you deserved it (5957)

On 05/19/2013 at 4:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML

#20081762
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22611) - you deserved it (12541)

On 09/21/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by RawrSparkle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that for the last six months my mother has been leaving my TV on FOX while I sleep, in the hope that my subconscious will absorb it and turn me into "a morally-upright human being". FML

#18529063
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27512) - you deserved it (4563)

On 12/16/2011 at 5:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was cuddling up on the couch with my girlfriend, when my drunken mother walked in the room, slurred out, "Room for one more?" and leaped on top of us. FML

#18468865
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31882) - you deserved it (2816)

On 12/09/2011 at 2:38pm - love - by Vince (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, our Christmas tree was damaged beyond repair after my son and his friends borrowed it for a little experiment. They tied balloons to the branches and tried to make it fly, after seeing a similar video online. FML

#18468600
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21251) - you deserved it (3121)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:44pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States



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