Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

dcy1192

Offline (4 hours ago) | Search for a member

dcy1192

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 6 November 1992 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 557
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

dcy1192's page activity

Visits<b>nhatt</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 10:55pm<b>annie_012345</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 6:22am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/27/2013 at 11:07am<b>SerpentBoy</b> - the 02/27/2013 at 6:48am

dcy1192's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of dcy1192's badges

dcy1192's favorite FMLs

Today, my turtle, who had a little portion of the garden all to herself, died. My 5-year-old nephew wanted to "be like Mario" by jumping on her. FML

#19576176
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39908) - you deserved it (2632) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/05/2012 at 6:06am - kids - by Grindyloo -

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

#19572377
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15105) - you deserved it (45524)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

#19554232
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9827) - you deserved it (60139)

On 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I ran full speed into a brick wall because I saw a tiger. On the other side of a zoo cage. FML

#18583606
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8801) - you deserved it (34151)

On 12/22/2011 at 10:02pm - animals - by steve - United States

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49899) - you deserved it (5507)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States

Today, I have been pissing blood for 2 hours, ever since some douche in a Nixon mask ran up and slugged me in the kidney. FML

#17981728
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36113) - you deserved it (2386)

On 10/14/2011 at 11:09am - health - by Nixontones - United States (Illinois)

Today, at football practice, a 200lb lineman ended up landing on my stomach. The weight made me shit myself. My new nickname is "Muddbutt". FML

#17880531
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35404) - you deserved it (4538)

On 10/01/2011 at 6:45pm - misc - by FirstStringQB - United States (California)

Today, I watched my neighbor bring his dogs into my yard to let them empty their piss-pipes and poop-chutes. He does this twice a day. I put a "cut it out" sign up. His dogs peed on the sign and knocked it down. My lawn is a landmine of dog logs and I don't know what to do, besides installing actual landmines. FML

Today, my little brother proudly informed me that he found a way to suck pool water up his asshole. FML

#17487267
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36786) - you deserved it (3130)

On 08/16/2011 at 2:22am - kids - by Gross... (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went with my boyfriend to the OC fair. He was taking a picture of me in front of a giant mechanical butterfly at the insect exhibit. Playfully, he told me to pretend to be a butterfly, so I quickly lifted my arms, just in time to slap a 7 year old girl in the face. FML

#17271293
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31034) - you deserved it (5785)

On 07/26/2011 at 7:19pm - kids - by slappedright (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

#16912974
446 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68523) - you deserved it (7119)

On 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was really psyched to go see Kung Fu Panda 2 at the movies. Excited, I tried to do a flying kick off the cafeteria wall at work. Instead of kicking off, my leg crashed through the plasterboard and got stuck. My co-workers had to pull me free. FML

#16377844
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9524) - you deserved it (51789)

On 05/27/2011 at 8:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML

#14753781
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53147) - you deserved it (4305) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2011 at 3:09am - animals - by Anonymous - France

Today, my 5 year old son and I went out. As I was looking in the window display of a shop, I turned around to witness my son pooping in an open manhole on the street. FML

#13718140
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32009) - you deserved it (9253)

On 11/04/2010 at 7:54pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, in preparation for a presentation at work, I decided to take a handful of vitamins to fight my cold. As I was putting the bottles away, I noticed one of them was a laxative. FML

#13496892
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10030) - you deserved it (33606)

On 10/18/2010 at 8:44am - work - by sofakingweetodit - United States (Wisconsin)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: