[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

dayanara

Search for a member

dayanara
  • Town/Country : Newark, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 20 May 1994 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 1121
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About dayanara : number 1
I AM NOT SCENE.
number 2
I DON'T FUCKING TOLERATE IDIOTS.
number 3
I AM PUERTO RICAN.
number 4
MY NAME MEANS HUSBAND SLAYER IN GREEK.

that is all

dayanara's last visitors

Freezephatdaddy62angrynegro7drainyou123RushFanaticOthello22VayneValentinejudetheobviousrepyourclichelynnsixxLoosechangeXxXx

dayanara's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

dayanara's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw my wife pick her nose and suck on her fingers. We're 38. FML

#4677769 (113)

I agree, your life sucks (32097) - you deserved it (3590)

On 08/20/2009 at 8:32am - misc - by GroosedOut (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I drank 1.5 litres of water. I didn't go to the bathroom for 9 hours. During my one hour trek home on public transport, I was busting to pee but I managed to hold it. Walking 200m from my bus stop to my house was agony, but I still held it. When I got to my front door I peed my pants. FML

#4677149 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (14956) - you deserved it (29228)

On 08/20/2009 at 7:02am - misc - by anon9876542 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I re-dislocated my arm trying to get it out of the cast it was in because I didn't want to pay the $50 dollar fee to get it taken off. FML

#4660097 (194)

I agree, your life sucks (5995) - you deserved it (62873)

On 08/19/2009 at 5:02pm - health - by flaps (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that doctors can be wrong. Pink clothes, pink stroller, pink bottles, pink bibs, pink cribs and pink bedding to go with my baby that recently came out with a little pink penis. FML

#4483118 (426)

I agree, your life sucks (43233) - you deserved it (14235)

On 08/12/2009 at 7:36pm - kids - by Ouch (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of random names she thought of, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML

#4201087 (411)

I agree, your life sucks (56415) - you deserved it (11333)

On 08/01/2009 at 3:44am - love - by NinjaPanda88 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML

#3991086 (384)

I agree, your life sucks (47711) - you deserved it (20011)

On 07/23/2009 at 10:26pm - love - by Ella (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was standing by the bed naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opens the door and walks over to me, swinging her hips, wearing pratically nothing. About four feet from me, she trips on the edge of the floor mat, and uses my 'junk' to catch herself. FML

#3950301 (181)

I agree, your life sucks (63754) - you deserved it (4387)

On 07/22/2009 at 10:12am - intimacy - by Gordon (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was taking a shower when my boyfriend suddenly hopped in with me. We were getting a little frisky when my mom's hand unexpectedly came through the curtain, and dropped a condom in the bottom of the shower, all the while saying, "Keep it safe kids!". FML

#3932433 (377)

I agree, your life sucks (45399) - you deserved it (20571)

On 07/21/2009 at 3:45pm - intimacy - by uh-oh (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I got sick in the airsick bag as my flight landed. The woman next to me, trying to make me feel better, says "Don't handle landings too well?" I responded "No, I actually fly fine, I'm just 8 weeks pregnant." She looked at my left hand, noticed no ring, rolled her eyes and looked away. FML

#3867495 (393)

I agree, your life sucks (36383) - you deserved it (11302)

On 07/18/2009 at 10:27pm - misc - by preggersss (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, it dawned on me that I've been married for 6 months, but because of the Army I've spent only around 12 days total with my wife. FML

#3785387 (355)

I agree, your life sucks (57752) - you deserved it (8603)

On 07/15/2009 at 9:04pm - misc - by broooooock (man) - United States

Today, my brother and I were going to give our parents their anniversary gift which cost us over $3000. The gift was a trip to London in August to see a show on Michael Jackson's comeback tour. FML

#3237378 (366)

I agree, your life sucks (79684) - you deserved it (6389)

On 06/26/2009 at 10:31am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was driving 3 of my guy friends to a party that was half an hour away. There was an awkward silence for most of the trip. I just figured out why now. I've had sex with all 3 of my guy friends. They talk about it when I'm not around. FML

#3210112 (375)

I agree, your life sucks (8476) - you deserved it (72150)

On 06/25/2009 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my friend said he'd give me 20 bucks if I would ask out the ugliest girl in school. I did it. She rejected me. FML

#3171595 (375)

I agree, your life sucks (12653) - you deserved it (70649)

On 06/24/2009 at 11:33am - love - by steven (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I told my dad I was going to Walgreens and asked if he needed anything. He needed condoms, and that I should call him when I get there so he can explain the kind he likes. FML

#3113124 (92)

I agree, your life sucks (53819) - you deserved it (3579)

On 06/22/2009 at 5:03am - intimacy - by fml (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, was my boyfriends birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML

#3078421 (383)

I agree, your life sucks (49820) - you deserved it (19633)

On 06/21/2009 at 12:16am - intimacy - by jinxofsocal (woman) - United States (California)